LOVE AND RELIEF: COUPLE ADOPTS RUSSIAN CHILD

Mary Ann Farmer smiles as she hugs her 15-month-old son, Logan.

For Farmer, it is a celebration of both love and relief.

For Farmer and her husband, Keith, there is relief that they now have the second child they so desperately wanted.

The rural Scott City couple traveled to an orphanage in Russia last month to adopt Logan.

The boy's birth name was Igor. But he readily answers now to Logan.

In addition to Logan, the Farmers have an 11-year-old daughter, Taran.

For the Farmers, the joy of a second child has come at a price.

Mary Ann Farmer suffered three miscarriages in three years and the family dealt with a number of adoption agencies before getting Logan.

"It was an emotional roller coaster," Keith Farmer said. "It got pretty tough."

The Farmers filled out hundreds of adoption forms and dealt with numerous setbacks.

They also spent a lot of money in adoption fees and expenses. Mary Ann Farmer estimated they have spent about $25,000 in the last few years.

Of that total, about $21,000 was spent in adopting Logan. The biggest cost is the adoption fee, which in this case amounted to $13,800.

The cost is highest for infants. Logan was less than a year old when the Farmers chose him last November from a video tape sent to them by an adoption agency.

International adoptions cost more because of the travel involved. "Even domestic adoptions can cost $12,000 to $18,000," she said.

The Farmers paid several thousand dollars just in home studies, where a social worker comes to the house and interviews the family.

It is a standard procedure in any adoption. Each adoption agency requires its own home study, she said.

Their daughter was about 7 years old when the Farmers decided they wanted a second child.

Mary Ann Farmer was three months pregnant when she miscarried on her birthday, Sept. 13, 1992. She suffered another miscarriage May 20, 1993.

Mary Ann Farmer saw fertility specialists, but it didn't help.

She suffered her third miscarriage the next year. Again, it was on her birthday.

Farmer decided she couldn't deal emotionally or physically with another pregnancy. She had her tubes tied and the couple decided to pursue adoption.

They had looked into adoption prior to her third miscarriage, but now they turned their full attention to it.

After the second miscarriage, the couple had inquired about adoption with the Scott County Division of Family Services.

"They said there was basically no chance of us getting a healthy baby," she recalled.

The Farmers went through a series of adoption services.

"Lutheran Family & Children's Services denied us because were Southern Baptist. Baptist Services denied us because we already had a child," she said.

An official of the Lutheran agency said that Baptists were referred to their own adoption service in the past. But that policy has changed and Baptists now can pursue adoption through the Lutheran agency.

The Farmers signed up with Catholic Charities in January 1994.

The Farmers also turned to Adoption Option, a private adoption agency in Kansas City.

They had signed up before she became pregnant the third time. Then they canceled it. After the final miscarriage, they signed up with the agency again in November 1994.

They waited and waited. Mary Ann Farmer said it is difficult to adopt a domestic baby because more single mothers want to keep their babies today.

There also is concern that the natural parents years later will try to regain custody in the courts.

Tired of waiting, the Farmers decided in June 1995 to adopt a child overseas.

The adoption was handled by Adoption Option in Kansas City and the Association of American Nonprofit Adoption Agencies Inc. of Jacksonville, Ark.

The Farmers decided to adopt a Russian baby for two reasons.

"They said they were getting good healthy babies out of Russia," Mary Ann Farmer said.

Also, Russian babies look very similar to American babies, she said.

The Farmers picked Logan out of a video tape of Russian babies last November.

Then they had to wait months before finally traveling to Russia in mid-April to bring home their new son.

In February, they were all packed to go to Russia only to find out at the last minute that the adoption had been delayed.

The reason: The computer system in Russia, listing all the eligible babies for adoption, had crashed.

The delay was another blow for the Farmers. Mary Ann Farmer recalled that she just cried and cried.

"It was awful," she said of the wait.

On April 12, they left for Russia and the orphanage at Rostov-na-Donu, a river city of about 1 million people.

The Farmers took everything from baby clothes in assorted sizes to baby formula with them on the trip.

They arrived home April 20.

The Farmers still have their names on adoption agency lists just in case they decide they want another child.

The Farmers said adoption isn't easy. Mary Ann Farmer said couples can go for months without hearing anything from an adoption agency.

"Nobody ever calls you," she said.

"It takes months and there are hundreds of forms to fill out documents to gather, letters to mail, faxes to fax and just when you think you got them all done, they change their mind and want it done a different way," she said.

"Laws change daily. Political relations from one country to another change constantly," she said.

Going through adoption is an ordeal, she said.

"Adoption agencies hold all the cards," she observed. "It is a seller's market so be prepared to bare all and beg."