Ukrainian exchange student fears for family

As 19-year-old Maryna Loza watches the news about Ukraine from her university apartment, she is brokenhearted and terrified. After all, Kyiv -- the embattled Ukrainian capital city -- is her hometown. But it's not the only place she's called home. This time three years ago, she was preparing for a move to Naylor, Missouri.

"Everything started with me winning the FLEX [Future Leaders Exchange] Program," Loza said.

The program provides scholarships for high school students from Europe to spend an academic year in the United States, living with a family and attending an American high school.

"I was chosen by the wonderful family of Ryan and Christina Ainley. So I came to Naylor," she said.

Loza's time at Naylor High School during the 2019-2020 school year was "the best experience ever," she recalled. "Naylor took me in instantly."

She made good friends, she participated in cheerleading, and she was runner-up Homecoming queen.

Now, Loza spends her days pleading with foreign governments to protect the endangered lives of her family and friends.

After returning to Kyiv from Naylor, Loza realized she wanted to travel more -- to get out of her comfort zone, like she had as an exchange student. In late 2020, she moved to the Netherlands to study law at Hague University. When she left Ukraine this time, Loza had no way of knowing it would soon become a war zone.

"Unfortunately, my whole family and most of my friends stayed in Ukraine, and they are still there," she said.

Loza's family is close-knit. Her parents are both busy lawyers. Her younger brother just began his first year at college, and her youngest brother and sister go to elementary school.

Loza had plane tickets booked home to Kyiv to see her family for spring break. But at 4:20 a.m. Feb. 24, she was awakened by a phone call from her father.

"He said, 'You are not coming here anytime soon. Russian troops invaded Ukraine,'" Loza explained. "I was shocked and confused. I turned on the news and I could not believe my eyes -- there was a full-scale war. I was terrified for all people who were [in] the territory of Ukraine. My life was changed forever by this event."

Two years ago, she was a cheerleader at Naylor High School. A year ago, she was focused on studying to become an international lawyer. Tonight, like every night over the past two weeks, Loza will struggle to sleep; instead she'll try to process the destruction of her community's homes and hospitals, and think about her family -- who are scared for their lives.

With Kyiv under attack, Loza's family was forced from their home into a bomb shelter for days. Eventually, they were able to flee the city. Many people have not been as fortunate.

"Many of my friends [and] their families are hiding in the basements," she said.

The hardest part, perhaps, is the unknown. Loza's family and friends are often without cellphone or internet service, and she's unable to reach them.

"Every time you lose contact is like skipping a heartbeat -- you are not sure about anything anymore: whether they are safe or not, hiding or just busy, whether they are still alive," she said.

Loza is overwhelmed with feelings: panic, worry, frustration, anxiety, fear and guilt. She's tormented by the fact she is far away from the people she loves most, unable to help or save them. She's doing her best to channel these feelings into some kind of action.

The day Russia invaded Ukraine was the day she went to her first protest, where she pleaded for other European governments to help Ukrainians. Since she couldn't fly home, she spent her spring break participating in protests. She continues to divide her time between watching news, checking in with her family, and participating in political advocacy for Ukrainians -- these are the best ways she knows how to care for the people she loves back home.

While she cares for her community in Ukraine from afar, her community in Naylor is doing the same for her. Loza says folks from Naylor have reached out to make sure she and her family are OK.

"My host family, former American classmates, local coordinator, and just friends who showed empathy have a separate place in my heart. I feel your support," she said.

Every time Loza speaks with someone from home, they ask whether Ukraine will receive help soon from the United States or European nations. Of course, she doesn't know.

"I struggle to answer that question," she explained. "It is difficult to explain to my youngest brother and sister why (Russian President Vladamir) Putin is not being punished for all (the) bad things happening. Because even kids understand that it is not OK to hear sirens and sleep in the basements."

Like each of us, Loza has no idea what the future holds.

"Life is unpredictable and we have no idea what will happen tomorrow to us, our family, or friends," she said.

Even so, Loza's greatest hope is for peace in Ukraine, and she's not letting herself or anyone else off the hook for doing their part to end the war.

"During [times] like these, it is impossible to stay neutral," Loza said. "I want to reach out to the world, say 'thank you' for the support my country receives, and ask for more. Ukrainian people need help in any way it is possible to provide it: financial, humanitarian, moral, or any other action, which will show that you stand by us."