Two parents, two master�s degrees and six kids: �Come what may, and love it�

Ben and Sicili Hale moved to Cape Girardeau to each pursue master�s degrees in March 2016; three months before Sicili learned she was pregnant with their sixth child.

This weekend, at Southeast Missouri State University�s commencement ceremonies, the couple will receive their diplomas the same way they do most things: on-schedule and together.

�It takes a little bit of crazy,� Sicili said when asked about the couple�s approach to raising six kids � the eldest is 11 � while going back to school.

Ben and Sicili Hale help their six children finish up chores Tuesday.Tyler Graef ~ Southeast Missourian

But in the 14 years since they were married, they�ve found the key to getting things done is doing them together.

�Our lives have kind of been in parallel,� Ben said, tracing their paths from the street they both lived on during junior high in Bountiful, Utah, through their parents� independent decisions to move to Florida, to the mission trips in Brazil both he and Sicili completed as young adults shortly before they were wed.

�We had just kind of followed one another around,� Sicili said. �So we decided we might as well get married.�

The Hale family, from left, Meleah, Sicili, Tayven, Tyton, Aroan, Ben, Ellana and Rilah pose for a photo Tuesday. The six Hale children have helped with housework while Ben and Sicili have earned their master’s degrees at Southeast Missouri State University, which they will receive this weekend.Tyler Graef ~ Southeast Missourian

Their decision to pursue higher degrees, they said, was in part an extension of their show-don�t-tell approach to parenting.

�We want to learn and grow,� Ben said. �[Being adults with children] doesn�t stagnate our progression. We want to be able to lead by example.�

Ben, a novelist who has published more than 20 epic fantasy books � one of which publishes today � decided to study professional writing, while Sicili�s master�s is in secondary education. And finally graduating, she said, will be a welcome relief.

Tyton Hale, left, helps his younger sister Rilah adjust an Advent calendar while their brothers and sisters help with other chores Tuesday at the home of Ben and Sicili Hale.Tyler Graef ~ Southeast Missourian

�It�s been an adventure,� she said. �Date nights became study nights.�

And while juggling responsibilities and family time was difficult, she said their children, Ellana, 11, Tyton, 10, Tayven, 8, Aroan, 5, Rilah, 4, and 18-month-old Meleah also chipped in where they could, helping out around the house.

But despite the difficulties, Ben said the process has reaffirmed his and Sicili�s commitment to one another.

Tayven Hale, left, washes a bowl at the sink while his brothers and sisters help with other chores Tuesday at the home of Ben and Sicili Hale.Tyler Graef ~ Southeast Missourian

�It�s how we do things,� Ben said. �When we were first married, we decided we would learn to love everything the other person loved.�

That�s not to say their individual interests are narrow, however.

�We just do everything better together,� Sicili said. �I snowboard with him and he scrapbooks with me.�

Aroan Hale, front, clears a pillow from the stairs followed by his younger sister Rilah while their brothers and sisters help with other chores Tuesday at the home of Ben and Sicili Hale.Tyler Graef ~ Southeast Missourian

�That�s the foundation of our relationship,� Ben said, although Sicili has yet to cultivate a genuine appreciation of Ben�s subtitled kung-fu film collection. But she�s working on it.

�Things are less daunting when we do it together,� she said.

�It�s been hard,� Ben agreed. �Life is hard. But honestly, when is it not hard? So bring on the challenge.�

�Come what may,� Sicili said. �And love it.�

tgraef@semissourian.com

(573)388-3627