THE CASE OF THE WATERMELON PATCH MYSTERY; CHAPTER 10: EDDY THE RAC BECOMES THE PRIME SUSPECT

Lead in: Hank was rudely awakened by Eddy the Rac. At first, he was a little confused, but Hank soon came to a stunning conclusion. Maybe Eddy was involved somehow in the watermelon attacks ...

I began pacing in front of Eddy the Rac, as I often do when I'm about to lower the noose of evidence around the neck of a suspect.

"Now, let's go to the big question, Eddy. Did you or did you not murder, vandalize, plunder, and otherwise destroy the alleged watermelons in this patch?"

"Well ..."

"And let me remind you that what you say could get you shot."

"Wow. Don't need that."

"Exactly, but I still expect you to give me a truthful answer, backed up by your solemn raccoon oath of honor." I stopped pacing and turned my steely gaze on him. "I'm waiting for your answer, Eddy."

"Sure. Fine. OK. Here's the deal. Listen." And then he whispered these words into my ear: "They're not watermelons. They're gourds."

I stared into his masked face. "What did you just say?"

"They're gourds, big gourds, not watermelons."

"Wait a minute, pal, hold it, halt, whoa. And would you mind removing your finger from my ear? Thanks. What do you mean, they're not watermelons?"

He shrugged. "It's true. No kidding."

I stuck my nose in his face. "Listen, you little sneak, I happen to know that they are watermelons. Watermelon seeds went into the ground. Watermelon plants came up from the seeds. Watermelon plants don't make gourds."

He gave his head a shake. "They're gourds."

I was beginning to lose patience, and a snarl formed on my lips. "Eddy, gourds are small and look like watermelons, but they're not. Watermelons are large and look like watermelons because they are. These are watermelons."

"Nope. Listen." His little hands were moving around in the air. Just watching them made me dizzy. "First night they were planted, did the moon come out?"

"The moon? I don't know, Eddy. To be blunt about it, I have a steady job and I don't spend much time staring at the moon. What's the point?"

"Moonbeams can change the seed. Penetrate the spooniferous forkosphere of the seed. Mess it up. Change the deal. Start with a watermelon, get a gourd. Bingo. Happens all the time."

"Wait a minute. Are you telling me that moonbeams can turn a watermelon into a gourd? Is that what you're saying?"

"Right. Gourdoramic Contraption. Everyone knows that. You've never heard of it?"

"I ... uh ... I didn't say that, Eddy. Of course I've heard of it. I mean, you're not talking to one of your ordinary ranch mutts. I'm head of ranch security."

"Right. Guard dog. Bark. Stuff like that."

"That's only part of my job, Eddy. The other part comes in knowing everything about everything, including plants. I'm very familiar with all the technical terms you're using. The problem is that you're such a little sneak, I don't trust you."

"I can prove it."

I stared into his beady little eyes. "You can ... I don't think so, Eddy. See, when you're a sneak, nobody believes anything you say."

"Test. Got a test. You know science?"

I couldn't help chuckling. "Eddy, Eddy! Son, science is my middle name. I was doing complicated scientifical work before you were born."

"Great. Want to run the test?"

"Well, I suppose ... wait a minute, pal, slow down. You're going too fast for me. I need to give this some thought."

I walked a a few steps away and pondered this latest development. I didn't want to become a sucker to another one of Eddy's famous deals. I mean, let's face the terrible truth. The guy had fooled me once ... twice ... OK, he'd fooled me several times with his fast talk, and I had no intention of ...

But on the other hand, if I were totally in charge of the experiment and he had nothing to do with it ... hmmmm.

I knew he was wrong about the so-called "gourds" and there was only one way to prove it. I marched back over to him and gave him my answer.

"OK, Shorty, I'm going to take you up on your challenge. What's the test?"

You'll never guess what it was.

NEXT CHAPTER: Will Hank eat a cricket?