Support system: Family members help local artist make progress with her mental illness

From the sidewalk outside Gallery of Inspiration downtown, Burton Bock studies the paintings on display in the window for the First Friday exhibition.

Bock is more of a words person, a goateed former sports reporter and English teacher who fills his retirement days writing poetry and fiction. But the pieces in the window he found interesting. All were produced by his stepdaughter, 28-year-old Megan Staufenbiel, the featured artist at the gallery. She and Bock talk about the art; he especially likes the oil painting of a starlit nebula.

The art is more than pretty, though — it’s proof of the progress Staufenbiel made after years of struggling to overcome depression and bipolar disorder.

That progress, she said, would not have been possible without the support from her family.

Staufenbiel said although mental illness often afflicts several members of a given family, it affects the entire family even if only one member is diagnosed.

She’s seen firsthand the consequences of ignoring a problem instead of seeking treatment.

“Whether some members of my family want to admit it or not, mental illness has run through my family for a couple generations at least,” she said.

When her parents split up, she was only 5, but she remembers the differences in how they approached the issue of mental illness.

“For my [biological] father’s side of the family, I think it was a pride issue,” she said. “But my mom got treatment for depression. She wasn’t afraid to go get help.”

From her mother, Deborah Bock, she got not only support, but a positive role model — someone who made it a priority to break the cycle of denial and shame that prevents many from seeking help they need.

“Mental illness in all its many forms affects so many people,” Deborah said.

“You go to the cardiologist if you have a heart problem; you go to the podiatrist if you are having a problem with your feet. You should go to a psychiatrist if you are having trouble with your mind,” Staufenbiel said. “It’s no different than that.”

“We understand when she has difficult days,” her mother said. “But then, we all do.”

For Staufenbiel, anxiety turned into depression when she was 16 or 17, and her parents met the diagnosis with a mix of apprehension and hope.

“We were a bit resistant at first,” Burton recalled. “‘Is this really the right thing?’”

“Anyone would be hesitant to put a name on the problems that she was having though,” Deborah added. “It turned out to be a chemical thing that could be alleviated with proper medication.”

But conversely, not everything can be solved with a pill.

Deborah, a painter herself, knew the therapeutic benefits of creating art. So when Megan started to pour herself into writing and painting, her parents fostered it as a productive outlet.

“Art has always been an outlet for me as long as I can remember. From early on, I knew I wanted to be a writer and an artist,” Staufenbiel said.

After what she remembers as a garden-variety rebellious streak, she went back to school to study creative writing at Southeast Missouri State University, but a mental breakdown landed her in the hospital in October.

To her, it illustrated the importance of maintaining a functional support system.

“In my case, there’s always been a nature and nurture side [to my bipolar disorder],” she said.

“It came down to surrounding myself with the wrong people, and it broke me,”

She had to leave school, but she remains grateful she was able to receive the treatment she needed.

“That was one of the first times that I realized that my problems aren’t so bad,” she said. “And I have parents who have taken me in. They’ve never given up on me.”

She got on a medication that finally worked and became a regular at the Community Counseling Center-run Gallery of Inspiration, where she works.

Things at home gradually improved, but only after all three people embraced open lines of communication.

“I don’t want them to worry,” she said. “I understand why people want to keep things secret about mental illness, though.”

Burton said the key to maintaining communication is patience.

“And we keep our sense of humor around here,” he said.

Even then, the best family dynamic can’t solve a chemical imbalance.

“We wouldn’t have been able to do as much to help Megan if it had been just family,” he said, citing the Community Counseling Center as a partner in helping Megan’s recovery.

More than her parents now can see her progress; it’s on display downtown in the gallery.

“It’s such a relief to see that. It’s gratifying,” he said.

“It makes us hopeful to see [Megan] using her talents,” her mother added. “And see her moving toward reaching her potential.”

tgraef@semissourian.com

(573) 388-3627