Stress, anxiety important to manage during school closures

With school closures and some workplaces giving employees a work-from-home option, families could be experiencing new and different stress, said school counselors Kati Knaup and Kayleen Shaw.

Knaup, school counselor with the Cape Girardeau School District, said it’s important not to minimize your feelings, or children’s feelings, in response to news of COVID-19.

“I think it’s important to acknowledge fear and anxiety, and uncertainty, and finding different things that are helpful to process those feelings,” Knaup said.

Finding healthy outlets to help process those feelings is preferable to ignoring them, she added, because ignored feelings tend to come up in different ways.

“That might look different for everyone,” she said, and suggested keeping in touch with loved ones by phone, journaling, engaging in hobbies such as music or art, and exercising as good responses.

Helping to guide children to activities that help them process their feelings is also key, Knaup said.

Overscheduling time is not productive, Knaup said, but “trying to emulate a school day is really important.”

Children’s schedules have been uprooted just as parents’ have, Knaup added, and it’s important to remember that.

“We are in uncharted territory,” Knaup said. “For everyone, it’s looking a little bit different. Give yourself a bit of grace, know you aren’t going to have all the right answers. We’re all going through this as the same time, day by day, figuring out what normal looks like. It is going to be OK. We will get through this.”

Kayleen Shaw, school counselor at West Lane and Millersville, said keeping a consistent schedule and modeling calm behavior are good steps to take.

“Our children are watching us,” Shaw said. “We need to be sure we are a reflection of hope and positivity for them, since that will be a help for them.”

Shaw said what’s most important right now is not to be the Pinterest-perfect parent with a rigorous schedule,

“Anything we can do to make their day predictable is important,” Shaw said.

Making sure children have extra sleep is important.

“When we have extra emotions, we need extra sleep,” she said, and that sleep is more important than making sure everything on the schedule is finished.

Giving children some age-appropriate information about COVID-19 is important, Shaw said, but “I wouldn’t recommend they watch the news, but telling them nothing is also not the answer.”

Not giving any information actually leads to more stress and worry about the unknown, Shaw said.

Limiting endless snacking is also a good idea, Shaw said.

“What we take in affects our brain,” Shaw said. “A structured eating routine is good for them.”

Sticking with breakfast, lunch and dinner is good to reinforce the regular routine and to keep sugary snacks to a minimum, she said.

“Make sure kids have a variety of activities,” Shaw said. School is not just sitting in a desk all day, listening to lectures. Students have a variety of ways to learn. Play time, one-on-one teaching, physical activity are all important components of a regular day.

Connectedness is also important. Phone calls, FaceTime with friends and family, are important social connections.

“In our district, that is our teachers’ primary focus, from the administration down, what is most important through this is not necessarily what kids will learn, but that they know they’re still loved and cared for,” Shaw said.

“As a parent, we know what’s best for our kids,” Shaw said. “We do need to clue in to their behaviors and words and what they’re telling us. That tells us what they need.”

Shaw also recommended getting outside as much as possible.

“There are so many places we can’t go and things we can’t do, we have to remember the things we can do,” Shaw said. “I encourage parents to just see what life is like without ‘busyness,’ and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.”

Janice Ruesler, director of Counseling and Disability Services at Southeast Missouri State University, said, “During this time, many individuals find themselves isolating from others not only physically but also emotionally. It is important during these times to keep in contact with your support systems through formats such as phone calls, emails, texts, and other social media outlets in order to maintain your mental wellness. Please also check in on your friends who may not be reaching out at this time to make sure they are doing OK.”

Ruesler pointed to an article titled “Taking Care of Your Mental Health in the Face of Uncertainty” by Doreen Marshall, and said it’s important to separate what is in one’s control and what is not, and to do what helps each person feel a sense of safety.

Other resources include The Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741741 or National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-TALK.