Southeast basketball team meets with group home residents

The Department of Criminal Justice at Southeast Missouri State University hosted its sixth Division of Youth Services Day on Saturday at Crisp Hall. The Southeast men's basketball team gave a presentation to more than 120 teens from the Sears, New Madrid Bend and Girardot Center group homes.

The talk was followed by a question-and-answer period, a tailgate party and attendance at the afternoon Southeast football game. Ordinarily, teens from group homes meet with the football players, but due to the early game the players were unavailable.

Standing at the front of the room with the rest of the team, basketball team captain Michael Rembert stressed the importance of being accountable to each other.

"These are my brothers," he said, referring to his teammates. "We need each other. I see these dudes more than I see my own family. If you see your boy doing something wrong, you gotta stand up."

Accountability was important at the Girardot Center as well. One teen explained, "We're a high D-3 right now. That means we're doing whatever we're supposed to be doing without staff intervening." The group of a dozen teens, some as young as 14, agreed it meant keeping each other in line and leaning on each other.

Similar experiences

Rembert, who already has a degree in criminal justice but still attends Southeast, grew up in Chicago. He said the hardest part was not doing what everyone else was doing.

"I had to get home before the street lights came on," he said. "From the time I was in eighth grade a lot of the dudes I grew up with got locked up, passed away, had three or four kids -- I had basketball. What I wanted to do, the adults wanted for me too. I know for some of you it's hard not having someone to lead you, but doing what everyone else is doing is not going to get you where you want to go. Sometimes doing the right thing is not always cool, but it gets you a lot farther."

Teammate David Johnson said he came from a single-parent home. He encouraged the teens to find an uncle, a teacher or someone else they could look up to. "My mother had to do two jobs. You really have to appreciate that and realize what she was going through -- a female raising a male." He also stressed that friends may not be as much of a good influence as expected.

"Sooner or later they'll get you in a bad predicament and then you're in prison while they be chillin'. You've got to realize there's some type of light out there and keep pushing."

Grades were stressed by every player who talked to the teens.

"F is not for fantastic and D is not for dynamite -- the coach won't play you," Johnson said.

"In high school a lot of kids would be sitting on the bench, not showing off their skills because of low grades," another teammate added. "You've got to get the grades or you'll be doing the same thing as before high school -- sitting home with your mom."

'Making the right decision'

Basketball coach Scott Edgar talked about decisions and choices and how each day is a chance to make good choices despite the bad ones made in the past. "Maybe what's happened to you was a blessing," he said to the teens. "You have a chance to overcome it."

Edgar, 51, also explained the lethal difference between growing up then and now. "We used to fist fight to settle differences. Now the first thing is to get a gun. You've got to stop and think and maybe even walk away. ... Is this testing your manhood? No. It's making the right decision."

During the discussion, the basketball players and the teens discovered they had many experiences in common. Some players had children, received GEDs or had experienced problems at home.

Two of the 16-year-olds from the Girardot Center said they had also earned their GEDs.

One was also married and had a child. He said, "I'm in here for grand theft auto and two counts of assault. I missed my boy's one-year birthday."

A resident at the center for three months, he said, "The whole program helped me a lot. We've been up [to the university] here two times already. I see that all the stuff I did before was petty. I'd take it all back if I could."

He plans to attend Mineral Area College or Southeast when he gets out. "What I realized is if you want to do something you've got to stick your mind to it."

Another teen said the biggest impact the day had on him was that he realized that no matter what people told him about what he can't do in his life, he realized he can. "What they said was pretty cool. They've been through some of my struggles. I have a hard time saying no [to bad influences] and staying out of trouble."

Having received his GED last week, his plans included trying to enroll in EMT classes.

"Just because we made a lot of stupid mistakes doesn't mean we aren't good people," he said.

cpagano@semissourian.com

335-6611, extension 133