MAN TALKED DOWN FROM RIVER BRIDGE; WOMAN SPENDS AN HOUR WITH WOULD-BE JUMPER

It was about 3:20 a.m. Friday. Debi Oliver was nearly through with her 12-hour volunteer shift as a reserve police officer when the call came that a man was on the Mississippi River bridge and about to jump.

His friend called police and said he had been drinking.

Oliver, a peer counselor for the department, was dispatched to the bridge with Sgt. Jack Ruebel.

It is fortunate for the man Oliver was there.

Oliver knows about suicide: It been nearly five years since her 16-year-old son, Daric, took his life.

Since his death, she has dedicated much of her life to educating herself about suicide and how to deal with suicidal people.

When Oliver arrived, she found the man alone and frightened atop the bridge on the Illinois side. He had climbed to the very top of a beam after riding a bicycle there.

He was about 60 feet above the bridge's railing, police spokesman Sgt. Carl Kinnison said. The incident stopped traffic.

Oliver talked to the man for more than an hour, trying to persuade him to come down.

Oliver hoped desperately she was finding the right words.

"I acknowledged that he was scared and said that it must have been a tough night for him," she said. "I told him that we were there to help him."

At first, the outlook seemed bleak: The man initially refused to come down.

"He fully intended to jump," she said. "This man was suicidal. He had a plan and he had the means."

But Oliver didn't give up trying to reason with him, hoping her words were getting through.

Kinnison said they were so far apart they had to yell back and forth.

Oliver, who is a member of the Survivors of Suicide of Southeast Missouri, didn't hurry. She knew the best way to persuade someone to not kill himself is by talking about it.

"Talking about it defuses the situation," she said. "It gives the person an opportunity to become rational."

Her method eventually worked: Finally, the young man agreed to come down.

Police officer Bridget Huff and firefighter Brad Dillow went up in the fire department's aerial truck to bring him down.

"Thankfully, we got to him," Oliver said. "We reached him, we listened, we talked to him and then he listened."

Kinnison was glad it was Oliver who was there because of her training and background in counseling.

Oliver was immensely elated that the young man's life had been saved.

"I was very relieved that he was coming down; it was a very tense situation," she said.

But she says the young man may not be out of the woods.

"After someone attempts suicide, the chances of another attempt are greater," she said. "He has got to be in counseling to get his self-esteem back intact."

It is hoped this will happen. The man was taken to the psychiatric unit at Southeast Missouri Hospital.

Self-esteem is the biggest issue in regard to suicide, Oliver said.

"When we, as parents, as caregivers, can instill a sense of self-esteem and self-respect, it's the best way to make people not be as suicidal," she said.

There are no class or social factors that point to who is more likely to commit suicide, she said, adding that it could be the football star or the cheerleader or the ghetto bum.

"It's a tragedy to lose a single life this way," Oliver said. "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem."

When people feel suicidal, they should take action such as calling someone they trust.

"Call your clergy, call 911, call the hospital, call someone," she said. "That's what these people are for."

But, she said, it is also society's responsibility to help prevent the third largest cause of death among people ages 15 through 24.

"If someone is screaming out, we need to be there to help," she said.

Oliver has been a nurse for 12 years and has a degree in criminal justice. She has been a police volunteer for two years.