Keynote speaker urges solidarity, honesty at Women Aware conference

POPLAR BLUFF, Mo. — Chantelle Becking began her keynote presentation with an impromptu dance party, setting the mood and livening up the crowd for the last segment of the Women Aware conference at Black River Coliseum on Thursday.

Women Aware Inc. is an organization dedicated to empowering women. The conference invites female attendees of all ages and backgrounds to attend talks on subjects such as mental health, nutrition and finances, and take some time in between to shop vendors, eat and mingle.

More than 300 people attended this year, including Carroll Jarrell of Stoddard County, who visited breakout sessions with subjects from travel to tai chi.

"I loved it, I really did," she said.

This year's theme was "Born to Stand Out," making Becking a fitting closing speaker. Becking is an author, businesswoman, mother of five and self-described work in progress. She is co-owner of Becking Clinic in Dexter, Missouri, an all-natural health clinic specializing in weight loss, but really dedicated, she said, to restoring health and confidence, particularly to women.

"I help people get their lives back, whether it's at my clinic or I'm encouraging a woman, and let me tell you -- we're running on fumes," Becking said.

Becking spoke of her journey through hard life circumstances, such as divorce, the struggles of adoptive motherhood, and the pressure on women to take care of everyone else and act like life is perfect.

"We can't be everything to everybody and nothing to ourselves," she said, noting by the time some women choose to come to her clinic, they have not done anything for their own benefit in years.

Many of Becking's trials and pivotal moments are detailed in her book, "Unapologetically You: Freedom to Be." One thing life taught her is it is impossible to look at someone and accurately know their circumstances. Everyone struggles, she explained, and many women are especially burdened by worry. Becking cited a study finding 85% of women in America spend around two hours feeling worried, often about things out of their control.

"It's killing us," Becking said. "It's taking our joy."

The best ways Becking has found to fight the pressure women put on themselves are honesty, supporting other women and giving grace to one's self. While she had mixed feelings about the phrase self-care, she advocated taking care of oneself as vital to both women and their loved ones. For her, it was important to ditch the idea she needed to figure everything out on her own.

"You never have to figure life out," she said. "It can always be a work in progress."

Becking also introduced her friend and guest speaker Stacey Wilson, who shared her own story. Wilson described herself as someone who looked after everyone but herself until she received a diagnosis of stage 4 cancer.

"I was told by the oncologist the next day, 'You might as well get your affairs in order ... you probably have six months to live,'" she told the audience.

A year and a half later, Wilson is still alive, her cancer is still active, and she is determined to live with purpose and joy. A theme in her and Becking's talks was bad things do not define who they are, and both believe God can use their pain to do radical things.

"I'm not done," Wilson said. "I know God's not done with me on this earth."

Wilson's and Becking's presentations resonated with audience members, who seemed in good spirits as they left the venue or got in line to speak with Becking.

"I was very inspired by her," attendee Mary Duckett told her.

Overall, Becking hoped every woman at Black River Coliseum left with one thing in mind.

"The thing I want you to walk away with is the freedom to be," she said.