Image, meaning of marriage changes with passing decades

Marriage has taken on different meanings over the years. Society considers it foremost a union between a man and woman. But how couples make their marriage work depends on their expectations.

Some couples choose to live together as common law husband and wife, others opt for wedding ceremonies in a church or before a judge.

"In most states if you have lived as man and wife for a certain time or in some states if you've passed yourselves off as such, then it's considered a legal marriage and you have the rights and obligations associated with marriage," said Dr. Gerald Stott, sociology professor at Southeast Missouri State University.

Throughout history, there have been arranged marriages, mail-order brides and marriages of convenience. It's only been in recent decades that society has put an emphasis on marrying for love. How that changes society's perceptions of marriage isn't clear, "but what is fairly clear is that the economy has a powerful influence on marriage," Stott said.

In the 1800s, some entrepreneurs chose mail-order brides. Those arrangements "seemed to do pretty well from outward appearances," he said. In India there are arranged marriages in which the parents select the partner and that seems to do OK, he added.

But those women had less influence and wealth than most American women do today. "We've gone from the 1950s when few wives worked to now when nearly three-quarters of married women work," Stott said. Those changes influence when and why couples marry.

The idea that marriage conveys the status of adulthood isn't as true today as it was in the past when "if you were married then you're supposed to be looking after yourself and your spouse," Stott said.

Today's notion is that you can't marry until you finish an education and get a job so you can be self-sustaining. "None of it's set in concrete, but when you're married you 'settle down' and become more responsible," Stott said.

To some degree marriage is considered a rite of passage, he said.