COUPLE WORRY ABOUT RAISING CHILDREN HERE

When Tonya and Rathael Fambro moved to Cape Girardeau in 1984, they learned that black people were not treated the same here as in their native Chicago.

When they walked into stores, people followed them around and asked "May I help you?" a dozen times. When suggestions were needed about work-related issues, no one asked them. And when people talked about politics and world issues, no one thought they would have an opinion.

"There are a lot of stereotypes about black people in Cape," Rathael said. "Not being from here, we don't fit into their stereotypes at all. I think it surprises them that we're college graduates, but it surprises us that they think because we're black we wouldn't have an education."

The Fambros came to Cape Girardeau after doing graduate work at Southern Illinois University in Carbondale. After Tonya got her master's degree, she found a job in Cape Girardeau. Eventually Rathael found one too, so they decided to settle here and raise a family.

The Fambros are the typical middle-class professional family in Cape Girardeau. Tonya Fambro works as a counselor for vocational rehabilitation. Raphael Fambro is a technician at Procter & Gamble, and together they own Ethiopian Ocean on Broadway, a store that specializes in African-American books and gifts. They own a split-level home with two cars in the garage and a dog in the back yard. And they have two young boys who are honor students.

The Fambros don't understand why they are treated differently just because they are black.

"Well, I think Cape is stuck back somewhere in the '60s," Rathael said. "People treat blacks like they are not as good and the blacks seem to accept that."

Growing up black in a 95 percent white community can be hard too. The Fambros' children, Rathael II, 9, and Rashad, 6, were born and raised here. Rashad attends Montessori School and Rathael goes to Franklin Elementary.

Although they say they have not been the subject of any prejudice or discrimination, their parents are worried that things might get worse for them as they get older.

"I have mixed feelings about raising my boys here," said Tonya. "There is racism here, and I don't want them to feel that they are less than anybody else. And I worry about them not being able to identify with anyone."

When people in Cape Girardeau meet the Fambros, they tell the family that they are the exception. That isn't how the Fambros want people to think of their children.

The Fambros worry that a lot of young blacks in the area seem to grow up accepting that they are not equal to whites. In addition, they feel that area blacks aren't taught about their heritage and aren't proud of it.

So the Fambros try to teach their sons about black culture at home. They want the boys to know who they are and they want them to be proud of it.

That is part of the reason the Fambros opened the store. Ethiopian Ocean is the only store of its kind in Cape Girardeau. They don't have very many customers, which bothers them because they want more people to be aware of the black culture.

"In school, our first exposure to blacks is with slavery," Rathael said. "They don't talk about the history of blacks before that or the contributions that black people have made during slavery or since then. With our store, we are trying to raise the conscious level of black people."

Young Rathael and Rashad have learned a lot from the books at their parents' store and from their parents' teaching.

"We learn about black people and when they were slaves," said the younger Rathael. "We're proud of who we are."

Although the Fambros believe the boys are learning from them, they are still afraid that their children might give in to the environment and become the stereotype. They worry so much that they are not sure they want to stay in Cape Girardeau.

"I do like Cape better than a big city; I'm just not sure they can get their cultural needs met here," said Tonya.

The Fambros have worked to provide information to the community. Rathael has given talks to college students and he heads a diversity team at P&G.

The family is looking forward to this weekend's Black Family Reunion because they hope to meet other black professional families that share their concerns.