CHURCH FAMILY RESPONDS WHEN TRAGEDY STRIKES

When Mary Jo Filer lost her husband, John, to a heart attack, she found a community willing to step in and help her family through the tragedy.

John Filer died from a heart attack on Feb. 6, 1997. He was 37. He left behind four children, Michael, 5, Katharine, 3, and twins Allison and Rebecca, 17 months.

Hundreds of people offered condolences and sympathy. But Filer's church family at Lynwood Baptist Church stepped in to help her and the children continue with life.

Filer said, "Luckily I do have family here, but without my faith and without my church I don't think I could have made it through. I've depended on God's strength."

The Rev. Mark Anderson, pastor at Lynwood Baptist Church, said helping families is a priority for the church. "By helping others we see the love of God through people," Anderson said. "There are many individual and families we've helped through the year, but the Filers were somewhat unique."

The Filer family had joined Lynwood Baptist Church when Mary Jo was expecting the twins. She developed complications during the pregnancy, and the church responded. The babies were born healthy.

"Then came the crisis of John's death," Anderson said. "I was very proud how our laypeople were involved in this ministry. They were much quicker than I was in responding to this family's need."

During the visitation and funeral, church members organized babysitting so Mary Jo could be at the funeral home.

Mary Jo's Sunday School class and the choir brought meals, enough to feed the entire neighborhood.

College-age members of the church have provided babysitting services and have even offered to clean her house.

The children's Sunday School teachers put together baskets of gifts for the children. with books and videos and toys. "We got real good books on explaining death for the kids," Mary Jo said.

And the support has continued. April 11 was John's birthday. "That whole week was just really tough," she said. "His birthday was on a Friday and I had a lot of things planned."

She mentioned the birthday to several members of the church, who prayed for her that day.

"I was amazed how much easier Friday was than I expected. But I had the entire church praying for me," she said. "Just knowing that they were thinking of me and lifting me up in prayer gave me a lot better sense of calm and peace.

"I get lots of phone calls and cards, even as recently as this last week," Mary Jo said. "Just thinking-of-you cards."

Anderson said: "The acts of kindness now are helping her through the stage of reality. It's very lonely. So out of the blue someone will give her a call or come by or offer to babysit the children so she can have some time to be to herself."

The good thing about helping others is that both people involved are blessed, Anderson said. In fact, Mary Jo has stepped forward and offered her help with other families in the church. She recently made homemade pizza for another busy family in the congregation.

"I'm so glad that I'm part of a church where people are involved with people," Anderson said. "That's what the church is all about."

John's mother, Alice Filer, said knowing that church members were looking out for Mary Jo and the children has made her loss a little easier to bear.

"They are really a remarkable group of people," she said. "And they have really been a big support to us because they are so good to them."