Children get lessons on good manners at Governor's Mansion

JEFFERSON CITY, Mo. -- Seven-year-old sisters Shawna and Elise Rippee walked very slowly, careful not to spill punch -- on the thick carpet or on their fancy clothes -- as they sat to nibble on pastries during a break in their morning lesson on manners.

They are not part of an old-fashioned refining school. Instead, they were among about 30 children -- girls decked out in summer dresses and pretty shoes and boys in shirts and ties -- who gathered at the Governor's Mansion recently to spend a few hours learning about etiquette.

The one-day class is offered every Wednesday in July, and children roughly 8-to-12 years old come to learn nuances of culture. Table manners. Which one's the salad fork? Proper thank-you notes. Introductions.

The program is in its fifth year and draws children from all over the state -- and even the world. The Rippee girls, in fact, used to live in Jefferson City but recently moved to China with their parents, who are missionaries, and were back in town on a visit.

Ten-year-old Gabrielle Deimeke came in from Montgomery County for the manners class. She said some of the stuff the teachers explained she already knew, but she still gained some pointers.

"It's been cool," she said. "It'll be fun telling our parents what they've been doing wrong."

Her mother, Lori, said later that she hoped her daughter better understood why she has been working to teach her manners.

"I just wanted to broaden her experience with other people," she said. The program will "reinforce the things we've been teaching at home, that they're socially expected," she said.

Gabrielle and other children who took part in the event said it was a chance to learn something new. They enjoyed the chance to explore the home of the governor, dining on punch and petit fours and later, a four-course luncheon where they got to display their newly learned skills to parents or loved ones.

They also got to practice their manners lessons by greeting Missouri first lady Melanie Blunt, along with her nearly 4-month-old son, Branch.

Bailey Howerton, 12, of Jefferson City, said the things she found out would be valuable.

"I think it's a great experience," she said. "It's real important to learn these things. You get noticed if you do these things."

The children spent about 25 minutes in each of four different areas. They learned about speaking and writing, how to set a formal dinner table and how to dine properly. They also took a break to practice going through a receiving line and a buffet line -- always being given tips, such as not to use their fingers to take some of the tasty treats, and to save some nuts for the next person in line.

Eli Ward Cass, 12, of Springfield, said his grandmother, a volunteer at the mansion, told him about the class and he thought it would be fun to attend.

"I'm learning manners," he said. "Every time I usually eat I get food all over my face."

He said his new skills could come in handy: "I could convince Grandma to make a good feast. I could set the table and everything!"

It's fun to watch the children's transformation throughout the day, said Missouri Mansion Preservation executive director Mary Pat Abele, noting children arrive looking stiff or timid, but after a few hours of learning, "they think they own the place."

"It was an excellent opportunity to come to the Governor's Mansion and learn about etiquette," father Randy Rippee said. "It's something they'll remember for a long time."