CAPE FAMILY BELIEVES IN DISCIPLINE

The Rev. William Bird remembers vividly the day discrimination first affected his life.

He was a child living near Gideon, Mo., the son of sharecroppers. He planned a special trip to the movie theater to see Hopalong Cassidy on the big screen.

Bird's father had filled his head with stories about Hopalong. The excited youngster stood in line with money in hand to see the cowboy hero. Bird was turned away from the theater because he is black.

"I left that day feeling kind of numb. It hurt," Bird said.

The episode at the theater was the first of many instances of discrimination Bird experienced living in Southeast Missouri. He grew up in the days of segregation. Certain restaurants didn't allow black customers; others reserved a few tables in the back for them. Blacks were considered for certain jobs but not others.

For some, injustice made them bitter. But Bird resolved early not to let that happen to him.

"You can refuse to lower yourself because of another person's prejudice," Bird said.

As a teen-ager, Bird moved to Cape Girardeau, met and married his wife, Rose Mary, and started raising a family. He worked two jobs, sometimes three, and became a church pastor.

"We always tried to instill in the children the importance of education," Bird said. "We encouraged them to get good grades." In fact, the rule at the Bird household has always been that good grades are required before anyone can participate in sports.

They have five children, four boys and a girl. The oldest is 29; the youngest 8.

"We try to pass on to our children what my father passed on to me: Do it yourself," Bird said. It takes discipline and a firm grasp of values, he said.

Rose Mary agreed. "We have tried to teach the children you don't get anything free and anything worth having is worth working for."

She said it is important for her children to be proud of their black heritage. But it isn't the most important thing. "I tell them they can be anything they want to be in life, and it's what you are inside that makes a difference."

Bird said too many people make decisions based on a person's color when character is so much more important. "Character determines who you are," he said. "We need more emphasis on character and not so much on color."

Discrimination exists today, he said, but the forms are much more subtle. Often he fears the perpetrators aren't even aware of their actions. Bird predicts a lot of unrest, especially on a global level, and black families are in danger.

"Unless this generation coming along gets rooted in basic beliefs in God, they won't have the skills to deal with the chaos. They have got to know it doesn't have to be in my home. I don't have to let hate take me over."

Bird's outlook remains hopeful. He sees a generation of young people ready to make a change. "They are willing and able to do something, but they don't know exactly what they need to do."

The reverend has some advice: Read the Bible. "What we need to do is get back to some basic beliefs. We need to start building up the foundation at home. You have to fight for what you believe in. It's time to build. Fathers need to be reoriented to their role as fathers. Husbands need to find their place in the home. We need to instill these family values in our children."