Barbara thinks she may have learned to comfort herself with food when she was 3, the year her father died. At 5, she remembers eating a whole chocolate pie her grandmother had bought -- and her grandmother replacing it with another pie so Barbara's mother wouldn't find out.
The familiar advertising slogan "Nothing says lovin' like something from the oven" is only too true for some overeaters, says Barbara, a member of the Cape Girardeau chapter of Overeaters Anonymous.
Painful realities about obesity are being examined this week in Martinez, Calif., where Marlene Corrigan is being tried for child abuse in the death of her 13-year-old daughter Christina. Christina weighed 680 pounds and was ridden with bed sores when she died in November 1996.
Her mother is being blamed for not getting her medical treatment, though her last doctor's visit at age 9 was only the last of 90 in her short lifetime.
That doctor had advised the 237-pound girl to "eat less, exercise more."
The case holds a mirror to society's attitudes toward obesity and whether prejudices can make it harder for obese people to find the help they need.
Local professionals who treat obesity say parents of overweight children can find themselves in a quandary.
"It's such a struggle, knowing that's a health risk," says Claire Lafoon, a Community Counseling Center therapist who treats eating disorders.
"You're putting children at risk for ridicule and not wanting to be judgmental."
A recent study estimated that as much as one-third of American children are overweight.
Children can overeat for a variety of reasons. Marlene Corrigan's defense team has suggested that Christina had Prader-Willi syndrome, which is characterized by a raging desire to eat, low metabolism and a tendency to pick at sores.
Whether the child is overeating due to emotional needs like depression and protectiveness needs to be examined, Lafoon says. If emotional or trauma issues aren't present, then the child simply could be eating the wrong foods.
"Having a healthy lifestyle in the home goes a long way," she says.
She advises making fast food a "once-in-a-while thing instead of a way of life.
"...Do by example rather than force," she says. "Don't become the food police."
Scott Givens, a wellness specialist in the Biometrics program at Southeast Missouri Hospital, says it's beneficial just to get overweight children moving.
"A lot of times they don't feel coordinated enough," he says. "They're embarrassed to do the youth sports like soccer and basketball.
"We say, We don't keep score. You don't have to be perfect at it... Not to worry about being the right size or the right shape."
How overweight people feel about themselves is crucial, says Bill Logan, a nurse who is wellness coordinator at St. Francis Medical Center.
"The more they feel that society (devalues) them, the harder it is to get into that program."
The hospital operates both a Biometrics program for people who are just overweight and a program called Balance, which is for people who weigh at least 20 percent more than their healthful weight.
Raising the metabolic rate through a combination of aerobic and resistance training is key to helping obese people get control of their weight, Logan says. That's because the percent of fat to muscle rises as people gain weight, keeping their metabolic rate low.
"These people can eat very, very little and still gain weight because their metabolic rate is so low," Logan says.
Logan prescribes education, exercise and counseling for obesity. "Extra fat cells never go away," he says. "That's why it's so important to educate obese people. It isn't a short-term thing. Obesity is a lifelong condition."
Barbara first realized she had a problem with food the day her cat got injured. On the way to call the veterinarian, she found herself opening the refrigerator door.
"I was so upset. The way for me to deal with it was to stuff something in my mouth," she said.
In the Overeaters Anonymous's 12-step program, unconditional love is available to people who feel ridiculed and ostracized for being overweight, Barbara says. Sometimes they simply need someone safe to talk to.
"A lot of people eat because they can't deal with their feelings," Barbara says.
The goal of the group is to help obese people both accept themselves as they are and reduce their weight. "To get the weight off and keep it off, it's imperative to accept themselves," she said.
Overeaters Anonymous can be contacted at 264-4766.
The Associated Press contributed to this story.
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