A year out of prison, Joshua Kezer is steady in his desire to create a better future for himself and in his faith in God

One year after his release from prison, Joshua Kezer, a man wrongfully convicted in a 1992 Scott County murder, admits he has struggles. Mostly, though, he feels blessed to experience daily activities such as paying bills, washing his car and coming home to his own apartment.

Since Feb. 17, 2009, when Cole County Circuit Judge Richard Callahan, now federal prosecutor for the Eastern District of Missouri, overturned his conviction, Kezer said he has experienced a "kaleidoscope of emotions." Yet at least two things remain steady -- his desire to create a better future for himself and his faith in God.

"When I went into prison, I had made up my mind I was not going to become a statistic. God gave me the strength right away to not just become another brick on the wall," said Kezer, who spent nearly 16 years incarcerated. "That's carried me since I got out of prison."

Kezer, 35, took his first steps outside the Jefferson City Correctional Facility the day following Callahan's decision, which criticized the prosecution for keeping key evidence from Kezer's defense attorney.

"We always like to say we have the best system in the world, but it doesn't mean that it doesn't make mistakes, and it doesn't mean it's not capable of being improved," Callahan said recently.

Following his release, Kezer went to Columbia, Mo., where he was offered a job to paint and do drywall work. While the available work comes and goes, he said he's thankful to have been offered a job.

Less than one week after his release from prison, Kezer was offered another opportunity and was invited to speak about his experience at a meeting of the Kansas City Chamber of Commerce.

Ten days after his release, Kezer spoke to a group of inner-city youths in St. Louis, where he said he spoke of life and responsibility.

"It's a different experience for me to go from being a guy in prison that was just really needing to be heard, to someone that people want to listen to," Kezer said. "Maybe I'm someone they can look to for some encouragement."

Kezer has made numerous appearances and spoken to a variety of groups -- from prestigious lawyers and judges to kindergartners and elementary students. While he doesn't change the core message of his story, Kezer said he tells it in a way that applies to the crowd he's talking to.

If he's talking to a group of children, he said, his message becomes much simpler.

"I just talk to them about being good and how hard things are going to come against them at some point and not to worry because God is real. It'll be OK," Kezer said. "To a little bitty kid, that means the world to have somebody tell them that."

If he's speaking to a group of inner-city youths, he may speak of perseverance and rising above opposition and negativity.

When addressing a group of lawyers or judges, Kezer's message centers on the justice system and how he think it's broken and how it can be fixed.

Like his friend, Darryl Burton, a man also cleared in a Missouri slaying, Kezer supports a halt on the death penalty in Missouri. It isn't acceptable, he said, that he, Burton and numerous other innocent men in prison could have died for crimes they didn't commit.

"We were both a stone's throw away from being put on death row. We could be dead right now," Kezer said.

His future engagements include speaking at William Woods University, the University of Missouri School of Law and possibly Southeast Missouri State University.

"I can tell my story for five, 10, 20 minutes, an hour, whatever is necessary at the time, and for the most part it goes pretty well. Their response is good, but you have to filter out the ignorance every once in a while."

Although Kezer feels it's important to tell his story, he said he's gotten emotional at a few of his appearances, especially when he speaks with men like Burton.

Their stories are difficult to tell, Kezer said, because often it's hard for a crowd to understand their experiences.

"It's very real and personal. As I listen to Burton, I know the places he's talking about, I know a lot of the people he's talking about. We were locked up in the same prison," Kezer said. "It was really difficult to try to be an innocent man in a world full of guilty people."

Although statistics of success on men released from prison aren't in Kezer's favor, he said he refuses to fail. God was faithful to him while he carried a positive attitude in prison, he said, so he'll carry the same attitude as a free man.

"In my life it's been OK to fall down because I know he's going to pick me back up," Kezer said.

In the future, he'd like to write a book, travel and continue telling his story to as many people who will listen.

"More than anything, I'd like to be a husband and then a father ... to be able to love a woman, raise a son or daughter or both," Kezer said.

ehevern@semissourian.com

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