600 letters, 6,400 miles

After 38 years of correspondence, Tina Dohogne of Chaffee, Mo., and her pen pal Michiko Yajika of Kawagoe, Japan, have grown close despite the 6,443 miles between them.

Accounts of their happy and sad times centered on love, holidays, family, war, the Kobe earthquake, Hurricane Katrina, the New Madrid fault and the flood of 1993. Some of the letters penned to Yajika described Dohogne's fears of the transition to high school and the emotional trauma when her brother was in a coma for three months.

The two have sent about 600 letters, both on paper and by e-mail, to each other over the years.

The idea of traveling to Japan has been on Dohogne's mind recently, but health and finances have stood in the way. In an e-mail Dohogne wrote, "Life is so short and you never know what will happen next. So much time has passed now and instead of being 11, we are both getting ready to turn 50. I looked into round trip tickets last year before I had skin cancer. They were about $1,800."

Dohogne wishes to meet her pen pal.

"She is one of my best friends, one that could never be replaced. I pray to God I get to meet her," she said.

Dohogne wants to hear Yajika's voice and say, "Thank you for being there for me all these years."

KIT DOYLE ~ kdoyle@semissourian.com Michiko Yajika sent Tina Dohogne this map of Japan as a gift during their 38-year correspondence. She noted on the map where she lives, Kawagoe, (here also marked by the top red star) and the capital Tokyo (marked by the bottom red star).

Those years of correspondence began in 1970, when Dohogne's sixth-grade teacher at Guardian Angel School in Oran, Mo., Gene Otis Allen, introduced the pen-pal idea to his students.

Dohogne's and Yajika's early letters included general information about their age, birth date and favorite color. They also sent each other maps of where they lived.

In addition to letters, they have also exchanged gifts, such as a scarf and Japanese tea from Yajika, a little stuffed dog and a journal from Dohogne.

"I still have the first present she gave me — a pen and red notepad — the pen is kind of cracked. I never used it. I never used any of the gifts she gave me," Dohogne said. Still enclosed in its clear vinyl packaging with a date of 1974, the red notepad has an image of a character tapping away at a typewriter.

Tina Dohogne

Even though she had five siblings, Dohogne said, she felt a sense of isolation that Yajika began to fill. Dohogne would like to believe that in the same way she has helped Yajika, who describes Dohogne and her family as "my extended American family" to her parents, colleagues and friends.

Dohogne experienced marriage, motherhood and growing up in a large family. Yajika is an only child who never married or had children.

A letter from Dohogne in 2007 shared the good news of the upcoming wedding of her son, Cliff, the young man Yajika knew for more than 20 years through his mother's letters and pictures. "Yajika calls Cliff her son too," Dohogne said.

She wished Yajika would have come to the wedding but believes she's afraid to fly because of her pacemaker.

submitted Tina Dohogne of Chaffee, Mo., at 11 years old when she became a pen pal to Michiko Yajika of Japan.

"Michiko has been a large part of my life," Dohogne said. "She has shared every facet of her life whether it was good or bad and I have done the same with her. She is unique because she understands where I am coming from and is always there to lend words of comfort when needed."

In one letter Yajika tells about waiting in line to visit a shrine to pray for good health and happiness during the year. Pictures and clippings of her visits to shrines, festivals and floats in parades, Kawagoe's rebuilt bell tower and information about her town add dimension and life to the person Dohogne knows just through bits of paper.

In 2007 Yajika wrote, "I'd like to tell you about Kawagoe where I live. It is famous for its sweet potato." She listed the products of sweet potatoes including sweet potato french fries, cake, ice cream, pudding and even sweet potato beer.

Yajika wrote, "I've never drunk it because I'm not a beer drinker."

However, the exchange of letters hasn't always been regular. When more than three weeks pass between letters they usually begin with apologies for the delay in writing.

But there was a period of four months when Yajika didn't write because she was hospitalized to receive the pacemaker.

And one time Dohogne didn't write for six months.

"'Tell me what's wrong,' wrote Yajika in one of her letters. I had to reply and tell her my sister was dying of an inoperable brain tumor and I didn't want to talk or correspond with anyone," Dohogne said in an e-mail. "I was angry and depressed and didn't understand why! I finally came around and started writing her again as she had been sending me a letter once a week to find out what was wrong. She knew my sister had an inoperable brain tumor and that is how I left it. Michiko just figured I needed space as she said in her letter after I let her know I was okay but my heart ached. After that, we both agreed to make sure we stayed in touch because she said she was so worried and didn't know what to do or even how to help."

Dohogne said it would be great if teachers could start a pen-pal project for students now.

"So many of them have low self-esteem and maybe need someone to talk to and connect with. I know that it helped me to have somebody who I could share my feelings with, who didn't judge me and I could call my 'friend.' It was a start in making me the 'outgoing' person I am today," Dohogne said in an e-mail.

Both Dohogne and Yahika have had the valuable experience of learning about another culture through a pen pal. Dohogne said sometimes trusting those from another culture is scary but finds it important to break down some barriers.

Dohogne said, "In a lot of ways we are just alike."

Dohogne remembers her excitement at receiving her first letter from Yajika at school when she was 11. Dohogne, still delighted to receive Yajika's letters, leaves them in sight to reread and anticipate the reply she will prepare.

Most of Dohogne's friends and acquaintances who know about her pen pal are curious, want to see pictures and learn more. "They say, 'Have you gotten any letters from Michiko lately?'" Dohogne said.

cpagano@semissourian.com

335-6611, extension 133

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