Mentoring and friendship

Editor's note: This is the fifth in a series of stories with an introduction from Nancy Jernigan at the United Way highlighting volunteers and agencies who are active in or funded by the United Way of Southeast Missouri. To get involved, visit the United Way online at www.unitedwayofsemo.org, at its offices at 430A Broadway or by phone at 334-9634.

The United Way of Southeast Missouri is proud to partner with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Eastern Missouri in providing more than 300 mentoring matches in our area. Research proves that one-on-one relationship building with a young person is the most effective way to help them succeed -- particularly in single-parent families.

There is only one problem: We do not have enough people volunteering to be a big brother or big sister. It is a simple process, and there are staff members to offer training and support throughout your match. It is possibly the one thing you can do in your life that gets the biggest return for the amount of time you spend doing it. Not only does your "Little" benefit, but you will find mentoring as a "Big" to be one of the most rewarding experiences you will ever have. Take that first step and contact the local Big Brothers Big Sisters office at 339-0184.

Whitney Pohlman, 21, from Perryville, Mo., volunteers as a big sister when she's not attending classes at Southeast Missouri State University.

What do you want to do for a career?

My major is elementary education. Therefore, I hope to become a teacher; hopefully for first through third grades but any grade first through sixth will do. I'm in my fourth year and will graduate in May 2011.

How often do you volunteer?

For Big Brothers Big Sisters I volunteer once a week by picking my little sister up from school and spending time with her.

What made you want to volunteer?

I actually began volunteering because I use to be a social work major and you're supposed to do so many hours of community service. I had always heard about the Big Brothers Big Sisters program, so I decided to check it out to use for my community service hours. I ended up loving it, and even though I don't need those community service hours since I'm no longer a social work major, I stay involved because I love it so much.

What do you do with your Little?

We go to Dairy Queen a lot to eat ice cream; that's one of our favorite things to do. Sometimes we do less exciting things like just run errands to the bank or the grocery store. Sometimes we go shopping, but she usually has to earn that privilege by behaving in school and getting good grades. We also get to have sleepovers sometimes where she comes to my house and we play "Guitar Hero" or have fashion shows or make scrapbooks.

How do you think volunteering here has changed/affected you?

It has made me realize that others are always watching my actions so I need to be careful how I act. It has really affected me in realizing that really all a lot of children want is to know that they are important to someone. They just want to feel loved and feel needed in this world. That is a concept that I will take into my own classroom some day whenever I become a teacher.

What lessons have you learned through Big Brothers/Big Sisters?

I have learned to never judge people. You don't know what everyone's personal situation or where they are in life. I've also learned that best friends can come in all ages and sizes. Not only do Van'tazia and I really feel like sisters, I consider her one of my best friends. We get along great and we can joke around with each other. However, she always knows that I'm still in charge and that I am the mentor.

Tell us about a specific experience that sticks out for you.

The best experience that I can remember between Van'tazia and I, even though it's very small, is one day we had went out and ran some errands and I was driving her home and we were talking and she just stopped, looked at me, and said, "Thank you for being my big sister. Whitney. I love you." Even though it was like two seconds long it meant the world to me. It made me realize that what I was doing had made a difference in her life, and I felt more appreciated in that moment then I ever have in my whole life.

Why should someone volunteer with BBBS?

Someone should volunteer with BBBS because it is very rewarding. It really is not that much of a time commitment, and they work with your schedule. Helping a child is so rewarding because most of these children just want someone to listen to them and help them through the things that they go through in life. And once you get involved you'll want to spend more and more time with your little because not only do they learn things from you but you can also learn things from them. It's just a very rewarding and fulfilling experience.