Just make a decision

By Ellen Shuck

Please, just make a decision!

Have you ever tried to live with someone who never wants to take a stand? Anytime you ask their opinion, they answer with anything but a definite statement.

Jeanie was trying to reach a decision of whether to allow her daughter, Megan, to visit overnight anytime she chose. Jeanie and her husband, Jim, kept Megan's children, their grandchildren, and when Megan was an overnight guest, their grandson, John, was much more difficult to handle. He played one authority figure against another -- Jeanie against her daughter.

John frequented a much-needed counselor to help him deal with some issues. The counselor agreed it would be better if Megan would visit the children less often, but Jeanie didn't want to make her daughter feel unwelcome.

A decision had to be made, however, on the part of Jeanie and her husband. They must find a tactful way to break the news to Megan.

Jim never wanted to make a decision, it seemed. This characteristic irritated and frustrated Jeanie immensely.

Rather than making a choice or offering an opinion, he made such statements as, "It may be a good idea, perhaps," or, "We may have to look into it."

He often came back with, "I don't know; you decide."

Jeanie grew frustrated because you can't keep going back and forth. You have to do something. You can't straddle the fence forever.

Jeanie finally decided to talk with her daughter. Megan was startled at first and felt hurt, but she eventually understood the situation.

If no decision had been made, the arguments among John, Jim, Jeanie and Megan would have continued. Consequently, John would have avoided being held accountable for his negative temperament and disobedience.

You have to choose to go one way or the other.

Like a ship without a rudder, a child without guidance, a life without goals or a hiker without a compass, plans and lives can go astray without guidance.

Without taking a stand and stating your opinion, you are dangling in the air without a parachute. You're like a piece of driftwood being tossed to and fro within the water.

With no direction, you're in danger of ending up like pieces of debris -- piled up in a heap somewhere at a destination you never wanted to go.

Choices must be made. You have to live in and enjoy the present, but still be aimed in some direction, indeed possess a dream. You must have a goal with an end in mind.

Dare to dream, and refuse to forego your responsibility to make wise choices. Add your opinions and expertise to the world about you.

Be brave and take the stand you believe in. You may be the only person with the knowledge and insight to make the decision.

There's nothing more confusing than going to eat at a restaurant with someone who never determines where he wants to eat.

He will say, "I don't care where we go. You decide." Then when you list various places you like, he comes back with, "Oh, I don't like their food there," or, "It's not as good as it used to be."

Finally a decision is made anyway, usually by the other person, and a plan is made, and a goal is in sight.

Many times, people refrain from making decisions under the guise of good manners or being considerate.

Everyone's individual opinions are valuable, so don't hesitate to offer yours.

Learn to have the courage to accept responsibility and participate in making life's decisions. Most people around you will appreciate your helping them out in deciding an issue, if they ask you.

Jeremiah 29:11 says the Lord had plans. "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.'"

The Lord made decisions. You do the same!