Girl power brings on new kinds of pressures

NEW YORK -- Thirteen-year-old Emma Karasz says she's already received enough beauty advice to last a lifetime.

And between CosmoGIRL!, YM and Seventeen, Karasz has had her fill of fashion spreads and inspiring real-life stories aimed at girls her age. "Maybe it's just a phase, there are people that care about those sorts of magazines, but I'm not one of them," she says.

Same goes for the Limited Too, a clothing store that offers small-size versions of the garments found in its mother store The Limited, and all the American Girl products, including books, dolls and a magazine featuring adventuresome girls.

Karasz, of New York, says she'd rather play her guitar or maybe take an acting class than worry about girl empowerment.

Walk through any bookstore and you're likely to find shelves full of books that aim to help parents steer their daughters toward becoming self-sufficient and strong women, which isn't a bad thing but it also is becoming a cottage industry.

It started small with titles like "Reviving Ophelia" and soon mushroomed into other tomes such as "Girl in the Mirror," "The Secret Lives of Girls" and "Strong, Smart and Bold."

Click on the television and you'll see "The Powerpuff Girls" fighting criminals and saving the world while "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" tackles the undead.

The music business has performers such as Pink purging their emotions -- which are often angry and not at all ladylike, and Avril LaVigne and Michelle Branch, who strum their guitars with the force that was once seen only in men.

"For those of us that went through the age of Gloria Steinam, the girls today have no idea how great it is now," says Nancy Martineck, the mother of 11-year-old Katie Steinbach, who plays on several sports teams at her New York school. Martineck is impressed with her daughter.

Growing up in southern California, Martineck says that there were hardly any team sports for girls. She feels that by learning both teamwork and competitiveness will give Katie an edge in the corporate world that she didn't have.

The girl-power trend may be the natural evolution from the feminist movement from the 1970s. Instead of trying to be like men, young girls today are being taught to embrace their own gifts.

Brandon Holley, the editor-in-chief of Elle Girl magazine, says girls are looking for options and ways to explore the world around them.

For example, she says that one of the most popular features in Elle Girl is the "Global Girl" section which has photographs and interviews with teenagers all over the world. Although it is meant to highlight fashions, Holley says that it exposes American girls to new ideas, such as sky diving in Iran or biking through the Netherlands.

She says that "feminism" is not a dirty word to this generation but they're not interested in burning bras either. Instead, it's about getting what they want, because they feel that they should have it whether it's a sports team or a spot in a class.

"I definitely think that girls are taught to be stronger now," says 16-year-old Ashleigh Parsons. "But it's very competitive and I think that a lot of the pressure they feel they put on themselves."

As a junior in high school in Sparta, N.J., Parsons thought it would be a good idea to pair up older girls with younger ones in a mentoring program. Parsons' plan became more ambitious and organized and has even received a grant from Girl Power, a national organization sponsored by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.

Parsons' Girl Power program, which will address issues such as body image, self-esteem, values and goals, will begin in January.

Girls may have more opportunities now, says Joann Deak, the author of "Girls Will Be Girls" (Hyperion), but having so much to choose from is causing a new kind of stress. Since the girls feel that they can go to college and pursue a career in any field, they feel as if they have to follow that path.

Deak notes that 21st century girls live at a time when they only know Ivy League colleges as co-ed.

In fact, Deak's research has shown that most women don't realize any sort of gender differences until they reach their 20s and 30s when they begin to specialize in their careers.

"The problem is that they are expected to achieve when they're young because they have the chance to, but then again they can't achieve too much or otherwise they will stick out. It's a fine line," Deak says.

The harshest judges, she says, can be other girls.

"The competition is constant," Karacz agrees. "Girls will compete over everything from guys to grades to sports. After a while it can start to affect you."

Deak has worked with schools across the country and has noticed that much of the competition between women happens because they are competing for boys. When boys are removed from the equation, such as in an all-girl school, it is easier for educators to foster understanding between girls.

Regardless of their environment, Deak says that one of the most important things that parents and educators can teach girls is how to connect with one another. She says that girls, and later women, are biologically wired to be compassionate, and when they are faced with challenges, they often produce hormones like oxytocin which make them want to create bonds and connect with people. To fight these reactions would be counter intuitive, she says.

"We don't want to make our girls comfortable," Deak says. "We want to teach them that there will be times that they will be uncomfortable, but that even then they should forge ahead."