Family secrets- Book offers 100 ways to be a happy bunch

NEW YORK -- There is no secret recipe for a happy family, but psychologist and social scientist David Niven says there are several -- OK, 100 -- ingredients that help create the framework for a harmonious household.

It's important for family members to listen to each other, avoid comparisons and to be punctual -- all logical and fairly easy things to do, he says.

The goal is to create an atmosphere of good will and encourage mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers, and even grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins to genuinely enjoy each other's company, not merely tolerate one another.

"We tend to underestimate the importance of everyday activities. A family is built around the mundane, not the highlights like a vacation when the dynamics change," says Niven.

Each of the entries in "The 100 Simple Secrets of Happy Families" are based on research conclusions of scientists studying family life. The tips that can be implemented as soon as tomorrow include:

No. 39. Show up on time.

Punctual parents are the foundation of the consistency in children's lives; kids won't think they are being left on their own without guidance and supervision, and they'll feel like they can depend upon their parents.

"Anyone could do this, but many don't," says Niven.

No. 12. Tell your family story.

When parents talk about their upbringings and even their parents' upbringings, it gives the next generation a sense of the big family picture. They'll understand the relationships and not just see relatives as otherwise unrelated people who pose for a portrait on holidays.