Day care dilemmas: Advice on finding a day care for your children

If you're a working parent of a young child, chances are you have needed or will need day care for that child at some point. What should you look for when choosing a day care? What questions should you ask? What are the red flags that should indicate a day care isn't for you?

Security has become a big issue for parents over the years, says Becky Moore, director of the University School for Young Children at Southeast Missouri State University.

"We have a security system with a four-digit code that we only give to parents," she says. "It's then their choice who to give the code to for picking up and dropping off their child. We keep all doors locked at all times, and our staff is trained to identify the pickup person. If we are unfamiliar with them, we ask them to show their ID and we match it with the information we have on file."

Security was an important factor for Kacie Brumbaugh, a schoolteacher whose son is 20 months old and goes to day care.

"For example, if my mother went to pick up my son, which she has never done before, they would ask for her ID and cross-reference it with the list of adults I have approved to pick up my son," she says.

Julie Albertson, director of Christian School for the Young Years in Cape Girardeau, suggests parents determine what they are looking for in a day care before they start looking.

"It really depends on the age of the child," she says. "Needs for infants, toddlers and preschoolers are all different. We also provide parents with a 'tips sheet' listing what to look for in a day care."

Many other factors come into play when finding a day care that suits you best.

"Cleanliness is really big," says Moore. "A friendly staff, the type of curriculum and class size are all things parents should take into consideration."

Alberston agrees.

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"Teacher-to-child ratios, whether the facility is meeting state requirements, is accredited and is licensed or not should be considered," she says. "Also, does the staff seem warm and caring toward the children? Are the activities developmentally appropriate for the age of the child? Are the children engaging with materials? Are they receiving enough playtime outside? Parents should also check out (the facility's) feeding and diapering area."

Brumbaugh says accreditation was her top priority when she chose a day care for her son.

"Schools can be nationally accredited and can be licensed to watch children. There are strict guidelines for the NAEYC (National Association for the Education of Young Children)-accredited schools, and they are monitored by the NAEYC. Some standards include teacher-to-student ratio, curriculum, hiring teachers with appropriate degrees, assessments given to children to show growth, sanitation of the center and playground and classroom safety."

For Bobbie Owens, who owns and operates her own cleaning business, flexibility and knowing the caregivers personally were important factors when choosing a day care for her 2 1/2-year-old son.

"(The caregivers) have great character and have been doing day care for many years," she says. "They are flexible, which is very important because I clean two days a week, but if I need an extra day, they are fine with it and they let my change my days if I need to."

There are "red flags" to avoid when it comes to day cares and in-home care.

"We've had kids who have come to us from other day cares who have had accidents and nobody could tell the parents how the accidents happened," says Moore. "We document any accident or injury by filling out a report and making a phone call to the parent if a child gets hurt or injured in any way."

Albertson warns against day cares where there are too many children or where staff workers aren't engaging with the children.

"Make sure the staff is on the floor participating with the children, not sitting in the office," she says. "I'd also avoid a day care that has a lot of staff turnover."

Daycare directors and parents recommend looking for a day care long before you actually plan to enroll your child.

"I'd advise looking right away -- as soon as you find out you are pregnant," says Moore. "Our waiting lists average one and a half to two years, depending on various factors."

Albertson says the waiting list for infants and babies is the longest at her day care facility.

"Infants and babies are the hardest (spots to obtain) because those classes are the smallest," she says. "We only have eight babies in a class. By preschool age, there are more options."

Albertson says her waiting list averages nine to twelve months long, depending on the age of the child.

"We have you pay a deposit to hold your spot, but we will work with you," she says. "For example, we had a (parent) who planned to return to work in August, but she didn't end up going back until January, so we just deferred her child's enrollment until then."

Brumbaugh agrees that scouting for a day care early is key.

"When we announced the pregnancy to our family and friends, I immediately called and put my son on a waiting list," she says. "Infant classrooms tend to fill up fast, as they have the smallest numbers in their rooms, so spots are limited. My advice is to scout around and call as soon as you find a school that meets your criteria."