Have you ever been in a conversation you can just feel sliding downhill? A conversation where words begin to come out of your mouth and as soon as they do you would give anything to have the superhero ability to pull them back in -- to grab those words and put them back in your mouth which is otherwise occupied by your foot?
Unfortunately superpowers only exist in the realms of the imagination, comic books and made-for-TV movies. None of us will ever have the ability to retract our words. That leaves us with the only alternative of guarding our words. Proverbs 13:3 says, "Those who control their tongue will have a long life; opening your mouth can ruin everything."
The words we use matter. The rightly chosen phrase can make the difference between exploding a mundane relationship into one full of vibrancy and passion. Words can also easily lead a stable relationship to implode, taking with it many victims. In all of our relationships it matters what we say, how we say it and, yes, even when we vocalize our thoughts.
A well-chosen word determines your outcome. Those who have learned to choose their words well don't often need to ask for forgiveness. Many a husband knows never to answer the question, "Do these make me look fat?" Particularly with the response, "The clothes don't make you look fat, it's the double cheeseburgers that make you look fat."
A guarded tongue leads to a long life because it agrees only to well-chosen commitments. Ultimately words only matter when they are followed to completion. The opening statement "I will ..." commits you to whatever completes that sentence. Controlling the tongue brings long life because it makes commitments to what can be fulfilled.
Your words in all relationships bring long life.
Rob Hurtgen is a husband, a father and serves as the associate pastor at the First Baptist Church in Jackson.
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