Adopting a heritage

Several families in Southeast Missouri are part of a growing population of adoptive parents nationwide taking a new approach to raising their foreign-born children. Rather than downplaying their children's differences as was so often done in the past, parents are now embracing them in hopes that greater understanding will lead to greater acceptance.

Ever since kindergarten, Clara Snyder has celebrated Chinese New Year with her classmates at Orchard Elementary School in Jackson. Since Clara and her younger sister were born in China, their parents want to make sure the girls still keep some connections to their birth country.

So Judy Snyder crafted a paper-mache dragon head and a tail that takes five children to operate. The dragon makes an appearance each year for Chinese New Year at the school.

Clara, 8, says she doesn't feel any differently from her classmates because she is a Chinese-American. "If people ask where I'm from or think they know, they always say Japan," Clara said.

During her first year at school, the children noticed that Clara looked differently than they did, but now they don't seem to care, said Judy Snyder.

Snyder hasn't had any negative experiences out in public with her two daughters. In fact, she says people almost always smile at them.

When Clara was younger, "everywhere we went, and people saw us, they smiled," she said. "What a wonderful way to go through life, and what a wonderful perspective to have on the world."

Since she was a toddler, Clara has known of her adoption. She even traveled with her parents to China to pick up a 10-month-old Lizzie from the orphanage in 2002.

Judy Snyder said raising an Asian child as an only child in the Midwest where there is a relatively small Asian population seemed unfair. "And everybody needs a sister," she said. So the Snyders began the process for adopting a second daughter -- Lizzie, now 3.

The adoption trip also was a good experience for Clara, who was able to learn about her own adoption, Judy said. "We talked to her about the trip we took to get her." During Clara's adoption, the Snyders spent 17 days in China. They stayed 12 days for Lizzie's adoption.

The family drew some attention in China, partly because both she and her husband are tall, Judy Snyder said.

But back in the states that's not the case. "When I look at my girls, I don't see Asian children. When I look at them, I just see my kids."

Experts and other adoptive parents say children who understand their differences can better respond to ignorance throughout their lives -- ignorance that could damage their future relationships, romances and even careers if they aren't equipped to handle it. And they say it could reduce the teasing adopted children may endure.

Teaching Asian children in small, white communities about their heritage also helps them forge racial identities as children instead of finding themselves confused as teens or adults, said Kathleen Ja Sook Bergquist, a social-work professor at the University of Nevada.

Keeping their daughters' attuned to Chinese culture was always a consideration, Judy Snyder said, because family heritage is important to both she and her husband, a second-generation American.

"There are a lot of families that take their children to Chinese school in St. Louis to learn culture and language," Judy Snyder said. And the Snyders talked about that, but realized that their daughters are American and they should learn to respect many cultures, including their Chinese and American backgrounds.

The Snyders try to attend at least one or two events in St. Louis each year so their daughters will know about their culture. The events range from activities sponsored by the Chinese-American Society or exhibits at the Missouri Botanical Gardens.

Jane Freyfogle, a social worker with Lifelink International Adoption agency's Champaign office, said adoptive parents can go a long way to help their children deal with life in small towns by making sure they know they're not alone. Trips to cities, where kids can see other Asian faces, or to culture camps, where adoptees gather to learn about their heritage, can all help children overcome the sense of isolation they may feel at home.

"For folks in rural communities, they have to work harder at it," Freyfogle said. "They have to look for it. They have to travel for it."

Last year, Americans adopted 8,649 children from China and South Korea, the most children from any foreign region, according to the U.S. Department of State -- and that number is only increasing.

China and South Korea both have laws which permit -- and even encourage -- adoption by foreign parents. Additionally, China, because of its immense population and strict family planning laws, has a large number of unwanted female infants every year. The two countries have no religious restrictions on who may adopt, and are open to adoption by older parents who can find it difficult to compete for the limited number of children available within the United States for domestic adoption.

The Associated Press contributed to this report.