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OpinionNovember 18, 2016

Has your household pet been giving you fits in recent days? I think I know why. Blame it on the moon. OK, I have no scientific proof that the moon affects the behavior of animals, including humans. But a lot of scientists seem to think so, and I don't think they all got their doctorates at the University of Salem...

Has your household pet been giving you fits in recent days?

I think I know why.

Blame it on the moon.

OK, I have no scientific proof that the moon affects the behavior of animals, including humans. But a lot of scientists seem to think so, and I don't think they all got their doctorates at the University of Salem.

I can report to you that our resident feline, Missy Kitty, has been acting pretty goofy this past week. Sure, she has some silly habits all the time, but this week has been different.

For one thing, look at Missy Kitty's routine behavior. She's an indoor-outdoor cat, and she decided a long time ago that anytime she comes into the house she is entitled to more milk in her bowl.

Let me hasten to say that Missy Kitty gets a small amount of skim milk first thing in the morning and again in late afternoon. But that doesn't keep her from demanding more milk in between.

When Missy Kitty "demands," it is fairly obvious what she wants. She dances. She prances, she snarls, she snaps, she keens, she makes the voice of Death sound like a nursery rhyme.

I'm not kidding. When Missy Kitty goes into high gear and isn't getting her way, you know exactly what she is doing.

To wit:

Her carryings-on let you know, without a shred of doubt, that if she doesn't get her way she will be dialing the humane society's hotline and telling everyone what rotten humans we are and how she has suffered at the hands of uncaring giant beasts that walk on two legs and how we ought to be punished in the most painful way imaginable and how innocent little bits of furry fluff called cats are always right and never, ever tell a fib or try to rearrange the facts just to suit themselves and if something isn't done about this, Right Now!, there will be consequences, because cats, as it is well known, have friends in high places and are not the least bit afraid to unleash the wrath of those worthy protectors.

I can't say for sure, but I don't think I just imagine, while Missy Kitty is on one of these rants, that she -- yes, there it is again -- she winks.

But back to the moon.

Folks who know more about moons than all the rest of us say we have experienced a phenomenon this week, moon-wise.

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The moon did offer us some spectacular views in the night sky, and the moonlight was exceptionally bright. And most of us acted rather peculiarly at least part of the week. But what week don't we have a spell of weirdness?

Having been taught in school about the moon's effect on our planet, especially on ocean tides, I was a bit concerned about flooding along coastal areas.

Look at Florida. There was high-tide flooding in some areas, attributed to the supermoon. It was a wonder the whole peninsula of Florida wasn't submerged, since the highest peak in the Floridian mountain range, Mount Orlando, is all of three feet above sea level.

(I just made up that last bit. The highest point on the Florida peninsula is Sugarloaf Mountain, which is -- please don't laugh out loud -- 312 feet above sea level, fairly close to Cape Girardeau's 351 feet. Or is it Mount Cape Girardeau?)

Yes, I worry when people start talking about exceptional moon stuff.

Here's something else you probably already know about the moon.

Have you noticed that when you fry bacon that sometimes the bacon shrinks away and other times it doesn't?

Any hog farmer could tell you that when the animal-to-be-bacon was slaughtered is the reason. It all has to do with phases of the moon.

My folks and my wife's folks would never have thought about planting a garden without first consulting the Old Farmer's Almanac and seeing when the moon would be right.

Did it work? Let me just say that tomatoes have never tasted the same since then.

And, finally, a word or two about Missy Kitty's moonish behavior.

Does the moon really affect the cat and that's that?

Or does the cat look at the moon, see how big and bright it is and decide to mess with her humans' heads?

There's that wink again.

Joe Sullivan is the retired editor of the Southeast Missourian.

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