MISSOURIANA

Former Missourian Clarence Thomas becomes the 106th person to be named to the U.S. Supreme Court, a number that closely matches the time required for his confirmation hearings. Most of us should be real happy we won't be around for the 300th nominee.

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Accused by his wife of sexual harassment, one Missouri husband asked that she read his full written statement for the record before beaming him with that iron skillet in her hand.

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Why all the surprise about 134 congressmen writing checks with no funds in the bank? They've been doing it for years with taxpayers' money.

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If you think you have problems, consider all those map makers at Rand McNally trying to find enough different colors for the new Soviet republics.

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When viewers recently turned on their TV sets and got in on the Thomas hearings, some may have thought they were watching "As the World Turns" or "American Gladiators."

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If Clarence Thomas thought it took a long time for the Senate to vote on his nomination, he should be a high school football coach with a losing team in mid-season.