BE OUR GUEST

Dwayne Rutherford is a resident of Cape Girardeau, a graduate of Southeast Missouri State University, a former member of the basketball team at that school and an employee of the Southeast Missourian. In April of this year, he pleaded guilty to two counts of cocaine delivery. The jail time he served is discussed in this submission. He was paroled earlier this month.

The experience of a lifetime began as a quick and easy way to get some money but ended in a bad nightmare. When I woke up behind the barbed wire, I realized it was real. For you young people that don't know or believe, drugs are a means to a bad end, and there is no future in it.

The end is exactly where I was, with no future ahead of me. Facing possibly 14 years in the State of Missouri correctional facilities, all the positive things I had worked for down the drain, and the loss of freedom, family and friends, I was at the end of my future.

The nightmare actually began the day I thought of this so-called brilliant plan. From there, things only got worse, beginning with my arrest. This made me very popular with news reporters again. I spent two days in the county jail in Jackson and the next seven months in and out of court until the day of sentencing. My nightmare only became worse on that day when one man had complete control of my life. He didn't have a gun or knife in my face. I'm standing there thinking everything will be all right, then the judge said, "Dwayne, I sentence you to seven years in the Missouri correctional facilities." Right about now I'm really trying to wake up, because I'm thinking this can't be happening, but it's real.

Well, about a week later, I'm on my way to Fulton Reception and Diagnostic Center in Fulton, Mo. I'm on my way to a completely different world, not knowing a soul or what to expect. Now I'm in a complete realm of loneliness, thinking about my mistake and wishing I could take it back. Also, I'm wondering how my family and friends are doing now because I've really hurt them. I've been taken away from all the things I loved so dearly but took for granted. The most important thing of all is my freedom.

Now, I'm really controlled by the state and their rules. They have very strict and tight rules; rightfully so when you have a thousand or so inmates that all have possible contact with one another. Each inmate has a different crime, ranging from petty theft to first-degree murder, with most of the crimes being drug related. With the situation being as it is, you have no friends; it's every man for himself. Every man does what he has to do to get by. That's why you are locked in your cell for 20 hours a day. You come out for three hours of recreation and the other hour is spent going back and forth to chow. This goes on for about 30 days, then you are classified and moved to the next camp, which for me was the same spot, only a different building.

You have access to a gym, telephone and television now, but your first priority is work. Work is done in the kitchen for at least 40 hours a week for $10 a month. So you don't necessarily get to enjoy the gym; it just depends on the work schedule they give you. You still have contact with the same people, only more so now. This magnifies the possibilities of exposure to the violence and con games that go on. You can't ever relax because, if the inmates aren't on you, the COs are.

COs are the correctional officers that stand guard and try to keep law and order, but they can't catch everything and some don't try to. But they have the say-so and you are at their mercy, regardless. This I found out firsthand when I was thrown in the hole for sliding breakfast trays in, what was said by a sergeant, to be the wrong direction. The hole is where they put you for any type of conduct or rule violation you commit, or if they feel it is necessary. This place was given the right name, the hole, because you are locked in your cell for 24 hours a day, except for 30 minutes every other day to shower, and you are fed through a hole in the door. This entire experience was neither fun nor cool.

Being locked up is the worst part of the whole situation. You can't chill out at the mall, go to the movies, hang with your friends, or just be you as long as you belong to the state. Don't forget the ones that love you, those that are hurt by this just as much as you are.

As you read this, just remember this can happen to you. So don't be asleep to the effect drugs can have on your life. Drugs are a means to an end, and you have a good thing going now. Don't end your future with drugs.

God bless!