No frogs, but family finds hopping time at home

Just when you thought it was safe to drink coffee, along comes the Environmental Protection Agency with news that this is one drink that can kill you -- if you're a Caribbean tree frog.

The EPA has approved using caffeine to kill the tiny frog, a species known for its piercing mating calls.

The frogs, beloved in their native Puerto Rico, are a noisy pest to Hawaii's homeowners and the state's Department of Agriculture.

The frogs are about the size of a dime, but each male chirps up to 90 decibels, comparable to a lawn mower.

When these frogs party, you know it. We're not talking erudite amphibians here, but low-life pond scum. At least that's how those folks in Hawaii see it.

Of course, living in paradise, they may have forgotten what's real noise.

As parents, Joni and I know about noise. Becca and Bailey can crank up the volume in any conversation.

It's not that they mean to be loud. They just are.

I'm convinced that it's a kid thing. Children aren't born with hearing. It's something they pick up after a lot of trial and error.

Oh, they have ears. But hearing anything with them doesn't occur until they've moved away from home.

Actually, Becca and Bailey, ages 9 and 5, can hear certain words such as ice cream, shopping and anything to do with Disney.

But when they talk, they often forget about volume control. My mom used to say the same thing about me when I was a youngster.

Still, I doubt I was as loud as those tree frogs. Besides, nobody has ever accused me of sounding like a lawn mower.

As for noise, there's nothing quite like the rumbling sound of a runaway freight train or my children jumping up and down in the living room, dive bombing off the living room couch.

There's a whole lot of shaking going on, although as far as I can tell none of it's due to any party crazed tree frogs.

The living room isn't the only sounding board for our children. Lately, Becca and Bailey have turned our kitchen floor into a tap-dancing studio.

It's best not to cook in such an environment. Otherwise, you might get stepped on.

Becca and Bailey are taking dance lessons. Of course, they have the black tap shoes that are essential to anyone wanting to kick up their heels.

I'm convinced we ought to spray some cleaner on those metal taps. That way, the kitchen floor would be spotless after the kids danced up a storm.

Becca and Bailey have done a little tap dancing on the living room carpet too. But it's just not the same. There's no audible tapping. Tree frogs wouldn't stand for such quiet.

A house just isn't a home without a little noise. Thanks to our kids, our house is always a home.

It can get loud. But Becca and Bailey never once have sounded like frogs sounding like lawn mowers.

Joni and I are thankful for that.

We can do without the frogs. Tap dance or not, things are hopping in our home.

Mark Bliss is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.