MARK MY WORD: FORREST WHO? MANY PARENTS DON'T HAVE A CLUE

Forrest who? It's a question a lot of parents are probably asking today.

After all, parents with young children don't get to see a lot of movies other than those Disney cartoons.

If they watched the Academy Awards Monday night, they found out what they didn't see last year.

Watching the Oscars used to be like attending a family reunion.

Joni and I used to go to the movies all the time. We routinely saw all the nominated films for best picture.

But that was before we became parents.

Since Becca was born three years ago, movie-going has taken a back seat in our lives.

For one thing, it costs more to go to a movie. You not only have to pay for the tickets and all that popcorn and soda, you have to pay the babysitter to watch your child so you can go to the movie in the first place.

And by the end of the day, parents are too tired to leave the house. The children, meanwhile, are dancing on the ceiling, having sapped every ounce of energy from you.

Thank goodness for video tapes. You can stop the show for repeated bathroom breaks, spilled soda and other childhood calamities.

Joni and I are thrilled this year because we managed to see two of the five films nominated for best picture. We're still not sure how it happened.

We actually saw "Forrest Gump" at the movie theater. The other one, "Four Weddings and a Funeral," we saw on video tape.

We didn't come close to seeing the other three: "Quiz Show," "Pulp Fiction," and "The Shawshank Redemption."

The whole family has seen "The Lion King," the animated tale of back-stabbing beasts and lovable lions.

Becca has watched it so many times she knows the songs by heart.

If Becca were the judge, "The Lion King" would have won best picture hands down.

Joni and I didn't see "Bullets over Broadway," "The Madness of King George," or a host of other flicks that competed for all that gold hardware.

We did, however, see plenty of Barney tapes and Kidsongs videos.

Maybe Hollywood should give out purple Barney statutes to those cuddly, feel-good, kid's tapes.

Tom Hanks may be a great actor, but the true actor is the one who can run around all day in a fat dinosaur outfit and still remain in a good mood.

For the non-movie-going parents, here are my top picks.

Best Picture: "The Lion King" followed by "Barney Live in New York City."

Actor: A toss-up between Simba and Barney.

Actress: Cinderella in the cartoon version.

Supporting Actor: Rafiki, the mystic baboon in "The Lion King."

Foreign Film: Kidsongs' "I'd like to Teach the World to Sing" video.

It isn't really a foreign work, but it's certainly international in scope with all those singing kids hopping all over the world. Any video that has a man running around dressed in a giant ball of a globe should win something, don't you think?

Best Castle Award: Barney's "Magical Musical Adventure." You won't find an Oscar for the best castle, but there should be one.

Barney's video has a great castle, toy horses, and an elf named "Twynkle." You won't find any of that in that "Gump" movie.

~Mark Bliss is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.