MARK MY WORD: DEBATES WITH KIDS WOULD BE GOOD PRACTICE FOR A POLITICIAN

There's nothing like a great debate unless, of course, you're caught in such a predicament with your kids.

Then, it is just a matter of saying, "no."

Presidential candidates say "no" too, they just do it with more words.

When Vice President Al Gore and Gov. George W. Bush face off in Boston Tuesday for a 90-minute, televised debate, it will be the 18th time the Democratic and Republican nominees have met, beginning with the Kennedy-Nixon debates of 1960.

Of course, things were different back then. There weren't all those cable channels . We didn't have ESPN. We didn't have all those children's game shows where the main object is to slime your opponent.

In those days, you couldn't find a dictionary anywhere that would let you use slime as a verb.

But times have changed. It's the debates that are still stuck in the 60s.

It's just hard to get excited about presidential debates any more. Even the TV weatherman is more inspiring than a presidential debate.

It's not that we don't want to see a fight. Americans love a good contest. But we'd rather see them don some boxing gloves and fight it out in the ring than stand stiff and still behind the safety of imposing podiums.

Personally, I think we should hold a presidential debate on Nickelodeon. We would all tune in to see Bush and Gore compete in "Double Dare."

Maybe we could give them a try on "Monday Night Football" where commentator Dennis Miller could ask them totally unrelated questions about Greek mythology.

These days, presidential candidates know what's important about debates: a good haircut and the right stage makeup.

Forget these dull debates.

Maybe, we should put the candidates in a room with children and see how they answer all the tough questions, like what is their favorite cartoon or favorite ice cream.

Can they sing kids' songs or play school? These are questions that parents want to know.

President Clinton would be at ease talking about cartoons. But I'm not so sure about Bush and Gore.

I know my children would be interested in a president that likes to play school or finger paint.

In our home, there is no debate. The kids love "Scooby-Doo."

There are plenty of other debates in our home, however. The kids like to debate the word, "no," as if it were a major foreign policy statement.

Becca, in particular, hasn't found a "no" that she can't question.

Of course, she doesn't put up with much debate from her younger sister, Bailey.

And when it comes to the Barbie dolls, there's no debate allowed. It's either go to the tea party or stay in the box.

Usually, the Barbies end up at the tea party. Ken, clearly the silent type, often shows up too.

As far as I know, none of them plans to watch Tuesday's presidential debate.

As for Becca and Bailey, they'll be playing school.

For them, the only debate is who gets to be in charge. That's something that both Bush and Gore clearly would understand.