Going Goth in sunny Tampa

For me, the best part of city life is the assortment of people who come for -- or are produced by -- the collection of interstates and bright lights and tall buildings.

I like hearing people speak Russian -- at least, that's what it sounds like to me -- while apparently discussing the Cool Whip selection. I especially like all the Latinos, so ebullient compared to the WASPs from my Southeast Missouri youth. A group of men who may be from Turkey gather outside of our neighborhood Starbucks every night to drink coffee, smoke and debate something or other.

But, by far, I've been most entertained by the Goths.

It's no mistake that the "Saturday Night Live" skit, "Goth Talk," is about two teens whose show is broadcast on Tampa public access cable. Azrael Abyss and Circe Nightshade (actually Todd and Stephanie) tape the show in Azrael's garage on his days off from school and Cinnabons. They warn their viewers to "stay out of the daylight" ... until Azrael's brother, Glenn, inevitably interrupts the show by giving Todd noogies.

Teen Goths populate the malls of the Tampa Bay area, slinking down the corridors in black leather, buckles, netting and various locks and chains. They have jet black or blood-red hair and sometimes wear pale foundation.

The reason it's so entertaining: Tampa is the last place you'd think would cultivate Goth culture. The sun shines most of the time. The downtown is about seven tall buildings surrounded by hundreds of square miles of suburbs. It is less than two hours from Disney World, which everyone knows is The Happiest Place on Earth.

What do these kids have to be dark and miserable about? Trust me, when Marilyn Manson sits down to compose, he's not picturing Tampa.

So you can imagine my surprise when a longtime friend of mine got involved in the Tampa Goth culture.

Jerry is my age and a great success in his chosen profession. I always assumed that, once you made more than $7.50 an hour, your Goth days were over. But I didn't know until Saturday night that Tampa also has a more sophisticated adult Goth culture.

My friend invited me to a special Valentine's Day event at his favorite nightclub and handed me a frightening flier -- something about Valentine's Day being more about sex than love. Not wanting to be rude, I accepted. We got there about midnight, and there was Jerry, decked out in a white PVC jacket -- it's a material like shiny vinyl -- a matching boa and a gold top hat.

Other people in the club were wearing corsets and go-go boots -- and those were the men! I was prepared to bolt, and The Other Half looked like he could pass out, but it got more and more OK with each appletini. We stayed and met some of Jerry's new friends.

Turns out most of these folks are typical professionals through the week. Some of them are married couples. At home and on the weekends, they break out their floor-length jackets and padlocks and become someone else. I guess it's for the same reasons some yuppie couples toss aside their suitcoats and bras and hop on Harleys every weekend.

Not that I'm going to get into that bustier-and-black-wig culture anytime soon. Unfortunately, I AM that buttoned-down person everyone sees at the office.

But I'm going to start giving friendly smiles to those Goth kids in the mall. Even if it penetrates their veil of darkness and really ticks them off.

Heidi Hall is the former managing editor of the Southeast Missourian who now lives in St. Petersburg, Fla.