LETTERS: METH WARNING FROM FORMER USER

To the editor:

I remember reading all the stories on methamphetamine in the paper, hearing them talk about it on TV and thinking how full of it they were and how they did not know what they were talking about. It's ironic that I even remember joking about it with my friends. You see, at the time I was on meth, doing it every day, staying up six, seven and eight days at a time. I quit my job and pushed away all the people I loved and cared about. I let my house run down and had people in and out of my house at all hours. I would not let my child come see me. I made up excuses not to go see her. I was no longer in control of my life. Meth was. I lived for meth. I was full of hate and anger. It got to the point that I did not care if I lived or died.

Then came the day I thought would never happen, at least not to me. I got arrested and thrown in jail. I have been here 30 days now. My body is clean, and my mind is clear. I look back, and it's all like a very bad nightmare. What could I have been thinking? I wasn't. Meth was thinking for me. That's what meth does. It makes you not think, not care. All you live for is the drug.

All of you who are on meth, make yourself stop and think about what you are doing to yourself and to your family and loved ones. Think about how your life was before meth and how it is now. With meth, you have no future, no desire, no ambition. When was the last time you slept? What was the first thing you did when you got up? I know the answer, and so do you. How did it feel to have slept for three or four days because you did not have that line to wake you up? You would have given anything to get it. And then there's jail. Do you really want to lose your freedom, to be put in an 8-by-10 cell with no way out, possibly for years, pacing the floor like a caged animal, wishing you could be with your girlfriend or boyfriend or driving your car, if you even still have one? Believe me, it's the little things in life that you miss most when they have been taken away from you.

Please, take a few minutes and think about your life and where you want to go. Trust me, it's not jail. I know. I'm there right now. And you will be too if you don't make up your mind to stop meth. Life is too short. I've met too many of my friends in here already. I just hope you're not my next cellmate. If you don't stop drugs right now, it may be your door they kick in tomorrow. Then you no longer have a choice.

ROBERT BEAL

Cape Girardeau