For now, monkeys won't write best sellers

Bad news for monkeys: They're not going to make the New York Times best-seller list anytime soon.

Researchers at Plymouth University in England recently tested the theory that an infinite number of monkeys typing on an infinite number of typewriters eventually will produce something worthy of Shakespeare.

On a scaled-down study, they gave six monkeys one computer for a month. Instead of Shakespeare, these monkeys pressed a lot of S's. Forget Shakespeare, the monkeys didn't even churn out Stephen King. Sorry, Jane Goodall.

One monkey found a rock and, as one researcher put it, started bashing the computer -- something many humans have wanted to do when computer glitches arise. The monkeys also performed some bodily functions on the computer. Bill Gates wouldn't be happy.

But the bad news for monkeys is good news for writers:

Our jobs are safe.

And those who keep predicting that monkeys are going to replace us someday probably should start looking for better replacements.

Bad news for monkeys: They're not going to make the New York Times best-seller list anytime soon.

Researchers at Plymouth University in England recently tested the theory that an infinite number of monkeys typing on an infinite number of typewriters eventually will produce something worthy of Shakespeare.

On a scaled-down study, they gave six monkeys one computer for a month. Instead of Shakespeare, these monkeys pressed a lot of S's. Forget Shakespeare, the monkeys didn't even churn out Stephen King. Sorry, Jane Goodall.

One monkey found a rock and, as one researcher put it, started bashing the computer -- something many humans have wanted to do when computer glitches arise. The monkeys also performed some bodily functions on the computer. Bill Gates wouldn't be happy.

But the bad news for monkeys is good news for writers:

Our jobs are safe.

And those who keep predicting that monkeys are going to replace us someday probably should start looking for better replacements.