Boy Scouts: What's in a name?

Some things guys need other guys for -- without girls. It's why a father occasionally plans a guys' day with his son. They need that time--just the boys. Can't they have that? Apparently, not in the Boy Scouts. In fact, some Boy Scouts can't even just be Boy Scouts anymore. A name change is forthcoming to demonstrate that "let boys be boys" is now passe.

On the surface, a name change seems innocent enough. But this one represents another step in someone's idea of political correctness and gender neutrality. Notice the progression: In 2013, the Boy Scouts removed its ban against openly homosexual members. In 2015, it welcomed gay Scout leaders. In January 2017, the organization announced it would accept transgender members. In October 2017, it delivered the news that starting in 2018, girls would be allowed to join. And coming soon, in February 2019, the Boy Scouts program for 11-17 year-olds will undergo a name change because, well, can't have "boy" in its name. It will, instead, be called Scouts BSA while the parent company remains Boy Scouts of America.

One of the positive things about the Boy Scouts in its more than 100-year history has been its connecting of boys to men who are positive role models, in addition to boys developing healthy relationships with one another. Can't we let them have that--without their sisters and female neighbors lurking? Let boys be boys so they can one day be men. It's not like there's no Girls Scouts. Let the girls do their thing, and let the guys do theirs.

But I have a bigger bone to pick than the Boy Scouts' ridiculous name change. We now live in a society that thinks something is wrong with identifying as a particular gender. We no longer want manly men. We want adults who base gender on how they feel on any given day; that feeling determines their sex.

What happens as we strip away identity and male bonding? Later on, women marry these men and wonder why they're not "strong enough" or "manly enough" and why they run to their mommas when times get tough.

If we let them be men, let them have some dude time, perhaps wives will be happier, marriages healthier, and mutual respect deeper. When men get time with their homeboys and women with their homegirls, upon coming back together, they appreciate the respective manliness and softness of the other gender. Why folks gotta ruin everything?!

After we've turned boys into girls, we get upset when they get grown and won't hold the door open--or we get angry when he does hold it open because, you know, "I can get my own door!" We're all jacked up! As for me, I say, "Please hold my door!" Not because I can't--but because he should--and I appreciate it.

Here's a news bulletin: Men and women are different. We used to celebrate that. It's what made relationships click. Now, we want to neutralize everything--and everybody. No lines in the sand.

This "wake up and be whatever you feel like being today" stuff is ridiculous. We have two genders -- male and female. No, we do not have to succumb to archaic stereotypical expectations. I can outplay some guys in basketball, and some guys can out-cook me. But differences do exist because males and females are different. It's been this way since Adam and Eve. Back in the day, we didn't have a problem with separate bathrooms, separate locker rooms, separate changing rooms in department stores. Nowadays, we're offended. But, of course, we're offended by everything nowadays.

Lest I be misunderstood in my comments about the Boy Scouts, its membership practices about transgenders and homosexuals or its name change, don't get it twisted. I have nothing personal against anyone, and grown folks make choices and then live with those choices. I can love people even when I strongly disagree with them. In fact, I have little patience with people who are disrespectful to others because of how they choose to live. But I won't cave, either. I'm not much interested in being politically correct; I'd rather just be correct. So I unapologetically call bull on this "today you want to be a boy, so be a boy" and "tomorrow if you want to be a girl, be a girl" nonsense.

We are, sadly, raising children to live by their emotions at the moment. As much as some don't like it anymore, absolutes exist. Pretending they don't does no one any favors. One absolute is there are two genders, and the gender you are on Monday is the gender you are on Tuesday. Your feelings don't matter. The name change of an organization that is a cultural staple doesn't change that. Allowing girls into your organization doesn't change that. Some people say, "What's the big deal? It's just a name change. It's just bringing boys and girls together." It's that level of naivete that has brought us to this conversation.

I reiterate that I have no ill feelings toward anyone. I do, however, take issue with the blatant agenda to blur lines and blind eyes, to deny that truth is truth--whether it pertains to the Boy Scouts, gender identification and whatever's next. I especially feel to speak out when children are thrust into the center of grown folks' agendas that work to their detriment, which then works to the detriment of us all.

Adrienne Ross is owner of Adrienne Ross Communications and a former Southeast Missourian editorial board member. Contact her at aross@semissourian.com.