SOUTHERN EXPOSURE: DO CHILDREN REALLY NEED TO WEAR SEAT BELTS?

There is nothing more heart-breaking than a child dying because of stupidity. Children die far too often as it is from disease, murder and accidents.

I understand the philosophy behind not securing your child with a seat belt while driving. It's age-old and similar to the concept of letting a child touch a hot stove because they're not going to learn unless they get burned.

Yep, they go through a windshield a couple of times and, by-golly, they're not going to make that mistake again. They'll strap themselves into their seats secure enough to choke off the blood to their legs once they've met that dashboard head-on once or twice.

But they've got to learn this stuff on their own. I mean, after all, it worked for their parents. I bet those parents crashed a few windshields good when they were knee-high to a paramedic. And look at them, they turned out just fine.

I absolutely agree that parents pamper their children far too much these days. Remember that old adage, "Spare the road rash, spoil the child." It's as true today as it ever was.

But then again children complain so much when they have to sit still for a 15-minute car ride. They whine, they moan, they complain and they cry. A parent definitely doesn't have to put up with that -- no way, that's not why they became parents. They became parents so their children can grow up to be happy, irresponsible adults who have as little ability for self-restraint and self-discipline as their parents.

Besides, it's got to be funny to see a child fly from the back seat of your car right past your head and out through a windshield. I think if I were a parent I'd let my kid roam around the back seat without a seat belt -- or better yet, stand up next to me on the front seat of my pickup truck -- just so I could see that surprised look on his face as he goes flying out onto the road.

It doesn't matter that hundreds of children are killed every year because they are not secured with a seat belt. It sure doesn't matter that many of these deaths occurred when the accident was relatively minor and the only injury was this child that couldn't stop its body from traveling 30 mph when its parent had to stop quickly or hit another vehicle.

None of that matters. Every clear-thinking parent knows that all of that is just made up by the highway patrol so they have a reason to give you a $25 ticket. It's all malarkey. Why, I bet you don't know a single child that was killed in a car wreck.

Another thing. I don't have an air bag in my car so I think I'll adopt one. I figure I can get a nice plump kid with cute cheeks and a happy personality to sit on my lap as I drive. That way if I have an accident the baby will cushion my impact. The kid might be crushed but I'll be alright, and isn't that what really matters?

There is nothing more heart-breaking than a child dying because of stupidity. Children die far too often as it is from disease, murder and accidents. Why kill off a couple more because you don't have the backbone to put your child in a seat belt, or a car seat, and refuse to allow them out regardless of how much they complain.

Remember, their complaints are like pains. Having them means you, and they, are alive.

~David Angier is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.