Results versus effort

When I came along and was able to get out and "help" Dad he was close to 60. Ranch work is hard and at times dangerous work, so much of the time it was easier and safer for Dad to do the job himself rather than have me help and get hurt. I don't think it was because Dad didn't want me around. It just made sense. But one other factor entered in as well. I had a lot of want-to but not a lot of know-how, so when I did a task many times Dad would have to go back and redo it. I don't think Dad minded, but at times he'd just do it himself and make sure it was done right.

I guess what I'm thinking about is when "efforts" result in outcomes that don't measure up. The want-to and the try-to just aren't good enough. So how does one deal with a less-than-stellar outcome when the effort should get you a thank you and praises?

It's kind of like a new restaurant is opening, and all their help is new, and the equipment is new. It's a time when mistakes will probably be made. Some of the food will probably be overcooked and some undercooked. Some will be burned. We went to a restaurant kind of like this several years ago. We had gone once before, and the food was pretty decent. The second time when we showed up we noticed that the cook wasn't there, and that the staff was doing the cooking. We should have gotten sodas and called it a night, but we didn't, and the food was poor. The staff did as good a job as they knew how. The effort was there.

Down through the years I've put together a bunch of muzzleloader kits. The kits come with probably 80% of the wood stock inlaid which makes them pretty easy with basic tools. But probably 20 years ago, I built a Hawken muzzleloader pistol and rifle from scratch. Ordered the stock blanks for both and did all the inlaying. I did a decent job, and it has been my favorite hunting rifle since then. But when I show my rifle to a real gun builder he has to be thinking the want-to and the effort were there, but the results are less than stellar. But my friends know the effort and the results aren't really all that important. Effort in this case trumps results.

Kind of like my wife's cooking. Marge is a really good cook and can cook about anything. Probably not a fancy cook like what are on some of the TV shows. She has most of the spices she uses without going to the store and having to look for a weird ingredient. Now and then though she "burns the bread". It just happens. Same with my smoking meat. We've had a pellet smoker for several years now, so we've smoked about everything on it. Some of the smoked meats were OK, some pretty good, some really good and some not so good. Some were really tough. Our first briskets tended to be tough. The effort was there.

I believe the effort versus result should play a big part when someone is learning or new at it irregardless of the age of the participants. One can have beginners who are really young, but at the same time they know their stuff. New cooks or new drivers or new yard mowers or new mothers and fathers or new package deliverers are new and deserve a little bit of grace and forgiveness. Kind of like a new Christian. Show them grace and keep your advice to yourself. Grace is also needed when you hand an I phone or a laptop computer to a 60- or 70- or 80-year-old and expect them to know what to do. Think back to when they were showing you how to eat with a spoon or drink from a sippy cup or how to use the toilet. Grace is needed big time.

Overlook each other's shortcomings.