On guard against whatever it is

Nov. 20, 2003

Dear Leslie,

DC says something is going around, that health officials have put out a warning.

She secretly loves warnings: Flood warnings, tornado warnings, terrorist warnings, warnings about improperly cooked food. I think they verify her belief in the dangerousness of the world. Though she would never admit it, I also think she derives a certain pleasure from living through it all, like a teenager at a horror movie.

She sees goblins behind the bushes and crack dealers on the corner, imagines a tornado might be the reason it's so quiet outside and worries when one of the dogs makes a noise she isn't familiar with.

DC gets mad at God when God seems not to care enough about the fate of His creation.

My belief about good and bad in the world is almost the opposite. The bushes hold unseen worlds to me, and around the corner the view is always new. God I don't worry about. God didn't create the Holocaust or wars or any of the other horrors that have been visited upon humankind. We create them through out beliefs and attitudes.

Fear draws toward you the very things you are afraid of. This is called the Law of Attraction. You get what you give your attention to, for better or worse.

Unlike God, humankind is not blameless, but we are fallible. Our failures owe much to our lack of belief in ourselves.

I am concerned that this state of being continually on guard creates unnecessary stress for DC. Your body is never totally at ease and completely relaxed if, like a sentinel, you are always on the lookout for something bad to happen. You never ever really let go.

Everyone could benefit from learning how to let go more. It's as if we are springs, sometimes so tightly wound by our lives and jobs and responsibilities that there's no place left to turn. My yoga teacher, Amy, sometimes has us students tense up our bodies as far as we can. It is possible to become very tense. As we release the tension little by little, we come to know how completely letting go really feels. It is possible to become very relaxed too.

It feels different from the way I feel in my everyday life.

Whatever it is that's going around, DC thinks I caught it. When I bent down to kiss her goodbye today, she deftly moved her lips to the side. I understood.

Whatever it is has made my voice sound like Froggy's on the old "Little Rascals" TV series.

I contend that colds really can be good for you, that they are the body's way of resetting itself for the change of season. The body has become stuck, stopped up. Suddenly everything becomes very fluid. Taking medicines to suppress the symptoms probably only prolongs the cold, but when my coughing awoke DC last night we both agreed this was a situation in which only two shots of Nyquil would do.

Temperatures are in the 50s and 60s as the end of November approaches. Winter awaits. We have replaced the screens on the front porch with glass windows stored in the basement. It's an annual ritual, our personal marking of the turning of the seasons.

We also have acquired new windows for our bedroom. The old ones let in icy drafts that made us dive far beneath the covers and gave DC headaches.

We are prepared for cold weather. I, at least, welcome the natural changes each season brings. DC keeps her emergency kit fresh and close.

Love, Sam

Sam Blackwell is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.