Excuuuuuse me

Feb. 15, 2007

Dear Leslie,

Ben Franklin was responsible for lots of firsts in American history, including the first library and the first fire department. He was the first postmaster general and the first electrician. He is considered a polymath, meaning he knew a lot about a lot.

Ben was good at most things except one: making excuses. "He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else," he said.

The worst excuses are the ones we give ourselves to protect us from failure, ironically only ensuring it.

I have a love-hate relationship with running, I tell myself. I would love to be a runner but so far can't make myself like it. In my office is a picture of a runner with an artificial leg, a reminder that whatever keeps me from running is only an excuse.

The only real excuse for not doing anything is "I don't want to." We also could choose to "because I want to."

Excuses rationalize not doing all manner of things we don't want to do: Stop smoking, exercise, clean the house, finish a project, control our weight.

Since last August I've been a member of a class working on that last issue. All of us have had some success getting rid of extra pounds. Now that we know how to do that, we're examining the psychological loop-the-loops that can stop our progress.

Our homework assignment this week is to name the excuses we most often use to overeat. Here are some typical ones:

• Health excuses. I need more calcium today, so I'll have a milkshake. I'd feel better if I ate something.

My own favorite health excuse: Energy level feels low. I should eat something.

• Giving-up excuses. I'll never be thin anyway. I've worked hard today. I need nourishment.

My top giving-up excuse is: I already ate more than I should have so I might as well finish the last of the cake, pie or potato chips so they can't tempt me anymore.

• Blaming excuses. My spouse doesn't like it when I watch my weight because we can't go to his/her favorite restaurants. My family likes me just the way I am.

My best blaming excuse is: My wife sabotages me by buying roast chicken at the grocery store rather than us baking chicken at home. The truth is that the roast chicken tastes better (contains more fat), so I'm secretly happy when she gets one and I have to eat it.

• Celebration excuses. It's my birthday, it's the day before my birthday, it's Friday, it's somebody's birthday.

My most-used celebration excuse: I've been a good boy all week.

• Victim excuse. I'm the only one in my family who has to watch what she/he eats. I have a slow metabolism.

My No. 1 victim excuse? See celebration excuse.

There are always good reasons to give up, to retreat into victimhood, to blame others for the situation we're in. The question is whether any reason is good enough.

The quality that most distinguished Ben Franklin may have been his lifelong curiosity. He never was too busy, too tired or too old to engage his sense of wonder.

Today on the treadmill I will search for a reason to like being there instead of an excuse not to.

Love, Sam

Sam Blackwell is managing editor of the Southeast Missourian.