Evolution of one guy's column

When I first began writing this "humor" column two years ago as a senior in high school, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. How was I going to come up with something every week? Was I going to be any good? But most importantly, was I going to get paid? I had to have some way to pay for my abusive Taco Bell habit.

As a mere child in the writing world, the idea of my column being available for thousands to read never crossed my mind. In fact, I thought the extent of my recognition was going to be a few clippings taped to our fridge, maybe a few "I saw you in the newspaper" comments from close friends, and that would be it. But when your column appears every week, more people than you might think begin noticing you whether they want to notice you or not.

Luckily, since what I write deals with unimportant topics like the mating rituals of flamingos or Oprah's ability to wipe out the giraffe population, the majority of my reader response has been positive since nothing I say is taken too seriously. It'd be a different story if my column consisted of me taking a side on a very crucial issue, like whether we should release dozens of rabid squirrels into the city's parks at night to reduce the loitering problem.

My friend and fellow columnist Callie Miller and I were recently exchanging comments we've received from reader e-mail. She said some people can say very hurtful things to you, because when you have a column, you're exposing yourself and they judge you on that.

That's another benefit of writing for publication. It's exposed me to other writers whom I can observe and learn from in order to better myself in the professional world of journalism. It's also given me the opportunity to meet and interview dozens of people, from Katrina survivors to inventors to pet cemetery owners.

However, I've been contemplating whether I want to go into the serious side of journalism. If you've read my column in the past, you'd know I'm afraid of messing with accuracy. I've done stories for the Southeast Missourian in which I did have to gather facts and quotes. It's a stressful ordeal journalists have to face every single day -- calling, e-mailing, leaving messages. And that's just to set up an interview. Once that's accomplished, one must learn how to talk, write and listen all at the same time. Then you have to take those random scribbles and turn them into an interesting story.

With my column, I can sit at home in my underwear eating a bag of chips while typing whatever I feel like. That's the beauty of it.

And now, thanks to all of you, I'm still here every week talking about useless what-not AND getting paid for it. Think about that. I get paid for sitting in my underwear. Isn't that the American Dream? So to all you readers out there who keep me going, I thank you. And as a special treat, I'd like to buy you all a round of soft-shell tacos.

Contact Sam at sdereign@ semissourian.com.