Don't run away from problems

By Ellen Shuck

Wouldn't it be great if every time something unpleasant reared its head, you could simply walk away -- walk away from it all? I have certainly felt like getting away from it all and I'm certain that I'm not alone.

Often you feel overwhelmed with other people's problems and concerns. It can seem that you're living your life all for other people. Where is the time for me, you ask? I can't do what I need to do because I'm so busy trying to help others solve their dilemmas. You feel that your whole life is dedicated to others. You've been taught, since childhood, that you always help others so you feel unchristian or unfeeling when you refrain from diving into everyone's problems and helping them.

You stew and walk the floor. Yet, while you're in the middle of the fishbowl of family disagreements that may not involve you, you can feel unappreciated. The lesson there is that you can't solve other people's challenges, personality or change their will. You can help and offer your assistance in trying to help straighten out the discord in certain situations. Then you have to step back and allow people and circumstances to take their course. You can worry, fume, cry and wring your hands, but that's about all you can do except pray.

If you stay involved in matters of which aren't particularly your affairs, you hurt yourself. Your mind and heart are kept tied up inside you. You allow yourself to become consumed by the life of those of whom you have no control.

Don't ever expect appreciation. If you receive thanks for what you contribute, it's wonderful and is the way life should work, but don't expect gratitude. Don't wait for thanks because if that's the reason for your doing what you do, then forget it. You will be disappointed much of the time and it's no reason for performing good and showing love and consideration. You do because it's the right thing.

How do you respond to problems and challenges? Do you rationalize them, ignore them, run away from them, and deny they exist, ask God to take them away, blame them on someone else or pray for God's assistance in handling them?

Do you think you are the only one who has problems, who wants to run away, who wishes you never had problems or yours are worst of all?

Before you actually contemplate running away, moving to a different location to get away from situations and people, changing jobs or professions, remember that all things come to an end and everyone has problems and challenges. Most importantly, don't forget to call on your higher power. To me, that is Jesus Christ. Others may believe in another supreme being. Psalm 34:4-5 in The Holy Bible gives you reason to keep your eyes on Jesus. "I prayed to the Lord, and He answered me; he freed me from all my fears. The oppressed look to him and are glad; they will never be disappointed."

What I'm going to suggest may sound erratic, but don't pray for no problems and challenges. They serve a purpose. But, remember to pray and believe that God will strengthen you. As St. Francis DeSales says in his Golden Counsels "He has kept you hitherto -- do you but hold fast to his dear hand, and he will lead you safely through all things." The pain you feel now won't last forever. Believe it or not look at problems as opportunities.

James 1: 2-3 tells you how to endure the hardship you encounter. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."

Don't run away. Instead, look towards God and experience his protection. See your faith increase when you achieve victory by refusing to give up the struggle. It isn't the struggle that defeats you, it's the failure to struggle (Joan Chittister).