Deposits and debits

It's been a lot of years ago -- and really not sure how long but sure been awhile -- I read an article on deposits and debits but not concerning money. It was about relationships. When two people become friends or start a relationship, each of them has a bank inside them that their friend deposits good into their bank. If one of them does something particularly good, then points are deposited in their friend's account. But this applies to both of them. Good deeds deposit good rewards. But when either of them does something disgusting or hurtful, then points are taken away or their friend's account is debited. How we treat each other determines if a deposit or a debit is placed on the heart of our friend.

We moved to Scott City back in 1986 when we began to pastor in a local church. Before that, we lived in Nebraska and Oklahoma and then Kentucky. We grew up in Nebraska so it will always have a special place in our hearts. But we also enjoyed Oklahoma, where we lived for three years, and then Kentucky, where we lived for four. There are some things which we really like about Missouri, but there are some things which we aren't fond of. We aren't crazy about the hot summers. So the heat during the summers is definitely a debit. But the winters are really mild so deposits for the mild winters. We can grow virtually two gardens here in Scott City. We can have a spring garden and also a fall garden. This is a definite deposit. Both our boys live here in town, which is a deposit, so we'll stay around here. When everything is considered, we enjoy Missouri life.

Most, if not all of us, have that friend we have spent some time with but we hardly ever hear from. So there are positive deposits in the bank with their name on them. Not a lot, but there are some. But then we get a phone call from them and they are wanting to talk about the weather and what we been doing and on and on. But in the back of your mind you are waiting for them to ask a favor or want some help. And after a time of chit chat they ask a favor. You knew it was coming and now it's out on the table. Debit some positive points. If our so-called friend gossips, then tack up some more debit points.

When a couple meets and falls in love, there are hundreds of deposits. From flowers to comments to little acts of love, both in the couple are probably are stacking up deposits. It's like they are both in the honeymoon part of their relationship. But eventually the honeymoon part will slowly stall and real life will set in. An unkind word will call for a debit. A missed anniversary or birthday, and there goes another debit. They may spend a romantic evening now and then which add some deposits. But in time, they may run out of deposits and all there will be is debits. Sad but true. And honestly, a couple probably won't last if all there are just debits.

Marge and I tend to go out to the same restaurants time after time. Most of the time we get the same items on the menu. Each time we go the restaurant, the staff are racking up deposits in their name. A particularly good meal means a deposit in their account. Waitress does a super job and some points are deposited. But if we go to the same restaurant and food is cold and not cooked right, then there comes the debits. But the thing is, if the deposits outweigh the debits, we'll keep coming back. But if the debits keep adding up time after time, there will come a time when we say that's enough, no more.

Same with work. If there is an attitude of appreciation at work, it adds a lot of deposits. If the wages are pretty decent or even above average, there are deposits. If the benefits like health insurance and vacation and sick leave and so on are good, then stack up some deposits. There may be some negatives, which will cost some debits, but if the deposits outweigh the debits, your workers will stay and make the company proud. Work in most cases will just be work, but if there are enough deposits it would be a great place to work. In other words, if the benefits outweigh the negatives, the workers will stay and probably enjoy it.

When kids are graduating from high school looking for work, I'd do the debit/deposit exercise. What kind of work would seem to cause them to make deposits? Not necessarily money but satisfaction deposits. What are they naturally good at that will add deposits? What don't they like which would turn into debits? Money or income is a powerful deposit, but a great income doesn't necessarily turn into deposits in our satisfaction bank. Being satisfied and happy at the end of a day or week or year of work can add some substantial deposits in our satisfaction bank. I've heard it said that if one truly enjoys their work, they will never work a day in their life.

Really this applies to everything in our life. Everything pretty much has both negatives and positives about it. We planted right at 24 different kinds of tomatoes this summer with 20 being heirlooms. Of these heirlooms, probably less than a dozen have good enough characteristics about them to plant again next summer. When we weigh the debits against the deposits, a bunch of them come up wanting. So we will plan on growing those with a positive deposit record. Most of them were found wanting. For some, the fruit didn't taste real good, on some the vine was inadequate. Some didn't produce enough fruit, and some simply didn't grow big enough. But then there were some that were impressive -- these had a bunch of deposits. We liked them and plan on growing them next summer.

There are times when I'm tired and a tad bit on the grumpy-old-man side. I just hope I'm good enough the rest of the time so overall I'm making good positive deposits in my friends' lives.