CLICK & DOUBLE CLICK: `SEINFELD' FANS UNITE ON INTERNET TO KEEP SHOW'S FIRE BURNING (COLUMN 84)

Unless you live in a cave, you probably know this is the last season for Seinfeld. It's surely the most famous show about nothing ever to come about. The audience tops 30 million each Thursday night.

Since the news of the end, the Internet has lit up with talk about Seinfeld and speculation about what the actors will do next.

Joni: I enjoy the show, but I mostly watch it in reruns. That's kind of the story of my life. But I like the plots. They're not very deep. Sometimes superficial can be fun.

Peggy: Yes, if I'm interrupted dozens of times by my children or husband, I can still follow along. The official site for Seinfeld is

www.spe.sony.com/tv/shows/seinfeld/index.html

Joni: This site is by Columbia Tristar Television. Let's take a look at Jerry's World. You will need QuickTime 3. We're in Jerry's apartment. You can take a look around. Look at the ceiling and see the stage lighting or turn around and see the audience seats.

Peggy: You can find out all the show facts and info about the four main characters, Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer. You can also learn about the actors' real lives. You can also view a short video greeting from Elaine or George, personally welcoming you to the site. I liked the greetings.

Joni: You can also chat with other fans or participate in the site's discussion board. Let's head to another site, the Seinfeld-O-Matic.

www.student.net/features/seinfeldomatic

Peggy: This site generates millions of possible Seinfeld plots from their database. You can submit nouns, verbs, people or sentences to add to the database.

Joni: It looks like a slot machine. The faces of Seinfeld characters spin around. Let's try. Jerry learns that Woody Woodpecker's favorite food is Bosco. Kramer goes to a movie with John F. Kennedy Jr. Hmmm.

Peggy: You can also discuss your thoughts about the show on this site. For more discussion on the show, let's go to TV Guide

www.tvgen.com

Joni: They have a whole section: Celebrate Everything Seinfeld. They have collected lots of Seinfeld stuff and explain that if we stick together we can get through the "Sein-Off."

Peggy: You can send an electronic postcard with Seinfeld TV Guide covers dating back to 1992. You can also view their photo gallery of the characters in unusual poses and settings. It's called Strange Bedfellows, and you can vote for your favorite.

Joni: These are very strange, and you don't get any explanation. I guess if we had seen every show, we would know where these shots came from.

Peggy: If you are a Seinfeld expert, try your hand at the photo flip. The idea is to name the sidekick characters with the fewest clues. But you can give up.

Joni: According to one figure we found, there are more than 50 Seinfeld fan sites on the Internet. If you are really worried about Seinfeld withdrawal, you can go to this extensive fan site.

www.xnet.com/~dsk/Seinfeld_2.shtml

Peggy: You can find the main characters and a list of the 19 recurring characters, plus information on which episodes they were in. The pilot, in the summer of 1989, was called "The Seinfeld Chronicles."

Joni: In the pilot Jerry refers to Kramer as Kessler, because that's the name on the buzzer. For each episode, they outline the plot and highlights of that show. For fans of George, a complete archive of hilarious images and sounds devoted to television's funniest short, stocky bald man.

www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Set/3573

Peggy: Yes, it's a Tribute to George Costanza. And more than 2.4 million people have visited this page. You have choices of images, sounds, bio and links. In other words, you can look at a bunch of George pictures.

Joni: Yes, it's George eating spaghetti, George talking, George looking at you. If you're a George fan, I guess this is the place to be.

Peggy: You can hear sound clips from both George and his parents. You can collect wave files, including "My name is George. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents."

Joni: Another well-done fan page calls itself the "Seinfeldiest Site on the Web." It's at

www.seinfeldiest.com

Peggy: He has every tidbit of news that ever mentioned about the upcoming last episode, with links to some. The site is updated daily in case you miss the slightest bit of new information.

Joni: The site also includes trivia. For example, what is the slogan for Kramer's workplace, H&H Bagels? And what food breaks Jerry's 14 year no-vomit streak?

Peggy: This trivia is tough. An occasional rerun viewer doesn't stand a chance. Instead, let's take a look at the video clips we can download. They have a lot of choices, but video clips take much longer to download than audio clips. The play-time ranges from 11 seconds to 156 seconds.

Joni: If you missed the "Soup Nazi" episode, you can find the whole script and an assortment of sound files here. If you want it all, download a Zip file with all 22 sounds. It's hilarious, and one of the most famous Seinfeld episodes.

Peggy: For more soup fun, you can go to the Soup Nazi Headquarters at

members.aol.com/rynocub/soupnazi.htm

You can test your soup-ordering skills here, but be careful or there will be no soup for you.

Joni: What's your favorite Seinfeld site on the Internet? E-mail us at click@semissourian.com

See you in cyberspace.

Joni Adams and Peggy Scott are members of the Southeast Missourian online staff.