BUCKING THE SYSTEM: TALES FROM THE MOM OF A PICKY EATER

Have you ever tried to feed a picky eater?

It's not easy, especially when the child has a gag reflex that's triggered whenever he is forced to eat something he'd rather not.

My son, Jerry, wasn't always so finicky. As an infant, he was a robust eater who never saw a jar of baby food he didn't want. However, the minute he took over feeding himself, Jerry became a child who could take one look at a meal, judge its consistency and color, and decide whether or not he'd like it.

At the age of 5, he now has a list of won't-eats that rivals that of a person five times his age who actually purchases his own groceries.

For example, Jerry is the only child I know who doesn't like macaroni and cheese, rice, most potato dishes, and any pasta that doesn't look like spaghetti. He likes broccoli, but only with Mrs. Dash and a sprinkling of parmesan cheese.

Pop Tarts can only be purchased in generic brands, ice cream must be vanilla, and hamburgers must be served with ketchup and pickle only. The latter rule is so important that I check all kid's meals before leaving any drive-through window.

And then there are the seasonings. My son will not eat any seasonings that he can see, which makes grilling meat or cooking light-colored foods a challenge.

Here's a typical dinnertime conversation at our house. Let's pretend dinner included corn on the cob (a favorite), meat loaf (no visible onions or other ingredients), and green beans.

"I don't want this green bean. It's got dirt on it."

"That's pepper, Jerry."

"I'm finished eating. Can I go play?"

"After you finish your green beans."

"But it's dirty."

"It's pepper."

"Uh-uh. I'm not hungry."

"Give me the green bean." and a few seconds later, "Now, it's clean. Eat it."

Brief inspection. "All right. Now can I go play?"

Of course, I'd win that exchange, but only because I did something to make the offending food palatable.

This probably is infuriating every person who grew up in the same "You'll eat it or else" generation that I did, but I'd rather have a peaceful household where at least a portion of the food gets eaten.

Besides, what did mentally force-feeding children foods they hated really get us? Definitely not an appreciation for the foods.

I know, because I still hate beets and liver, and would rather have unsalted Saltines for dinner than to see either of them on my plate.

Maybe that's why I've been willing to sort of go with the flow when it comes to feeding Jerry.

I only cook with angel hair pasta, and I try to season his servings in a way that he'll like. If necessary, I even make him a separate batch of whatever I'm cooking sans whatever is in the family portion that he doesn't like.

In our house, variety is the key. I try to balance meals with a "won't-eat," "might-try," and "I love" whenever possible. By doing this, I hope to expand Jerry's food selections without all the drama and frustration I remember from my childhood.

And when all else fails, the pizza delivery guy is just a phone call away.

Tamara Zellars Buck is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.