BUCKING THE SYSTEM: GROWING UP ENOUGH TO APPRECIATE FAMILY TRIPS

My family took a one-day getaway last weekend to Memphis to see a national tour of a Broadway musical. I went with my parents, husband and sister to the performance, which we were already familiar with since we've seen the Broadway version more than two dozen times on television and videotape.

It was the second time in three years we've made such a trip, but I didn't realize it was considered a family vacation until I overheard my mom talking on the phone recently.

Listening to my mom, you'd think we'd preplanned the trip and plotted exactly what our itinerary would be, much like we did the vacations of our past. She was enthusiastic and yet nonchalant at the same time, as if she knew she'd have a good time because that's what our family vacations are like.

Looking back, I know exactly where she's coming from, because we always have a good time together.

I can still remember the best vacation I ever had. I was 10 and my sister, Clarissa, was 6. Our parents had saved for an entire year for our dream trip, which included a visit to the World's Fair being held in Knoxville, Tenn., and to Disney World in Orlando, Fla., with stops at just about every amusement park in-between.

What a trip! I got to ride every roller coaster I encountered some with loop-de-loops, others with abrupt drops designed to make you lose your latest meal -- all with at least one of my parents at my side. I ate what I wanted, including multiple feasts of whole crab and other seafood entrees and all sorts of junk food I didn't need.

We also picked up souvenirs at just about every stop, which were many because this entire trip was taken by car.

I can remember sitting in the back seat and listening to my parents talk about music, politics, family histories, their relationship, and everything else they could think of.

And the music! I clearly recall listening to "Bump no more (with that big fat woman)" and a whoooole lotta songs by the OJays, and then groaning as Dad put in his favorite Merl Haggard cut. I don't remember if we were still listening to eight-tracks at the time or if we'd advanced to cassette tapes. But Dad has always been cutting edge in the audio-visual department, so if cassettes were around, I know we had them.

Everything we did was done as a family, and it was the greatest social, educational, personal and familial event I ever participated in as a child or adult.

I guess you don't realize how important those vacations are until after you're not taking them anymore. Or in our case, until you start retaking them.

My boys, Jerry and PJ, went to Memphis with us, but we didn't buy them tickets to the show. They were very disappointed, because they have watched "Smokey Joe's Cafe" even more than I have, and I really don't know who enjoys it the most.

Next time, I think I'll make sure they get to go to whatever we're doing. Who knows if they'll appreciate it or even know what the heck is going on? But it's not really about what you're doing or even how much it costs.

What's important is that whatever we're doing, be it roller coasters or Broadway musicals, we need to do it as a family. Even if they don't get it now, I know they'll understand after they grow up.

Tamara Zellars Buck is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.