BUCKING THE SYSTEM: FLOWERS CAN MAKE A PERSON'S DAY NO MATTER WHO SENDS THEM

I sent my pretend niece, Alecia, flowers for her birthday this week. As I stood in the florist shop wondering what to get her, I remembered when I thought only boyfriends and daddies were supposed to send flowers.

Who knows where I got it: television or the movies, most likely.

Of course, it could have been due to the example my dad set early on.

Dad has always been pretty predictable in certain situations. He always used to fuss whenever my sister or I asked him for spending money for a school-related event, just before he gave us more than we asked for. And whenever there was a major event in our lives, Dad was sure to be there proudly holding his videocamera (or these days, digital camera) in hand.

And on our birthdays and on Valentine's Day, we could always expect to hear our name called over the school loudspeaker telling us to report to the office. Upon our arrival, there would be a fresh floral arrangement or a simple rose with a card that said "Love, Dad."

It got to the point I expected those flowers to be there, especially during my high school years when there was no boy sending me flowers on my special days. Even though I knew they were coming, it made me feel special to know Dad was thoughtful enough to send me flowers.

He did the same thing with my mother. She always got flowers on her anniversary, birthday and Valentine's Day. It was like Dad's trademark.

And then came my freshman year of college. Right on time Valentine's Day, my flowers were waiting for me at the dormitory's front desk. I rejoiced in the wonder of Dad and shared my flowers with my sisterhood of single friends.

Sophomore year rolled around and ... no flowers! You would have thought somebody had died the way I moped around my dorm room. How could he have forgotten, I wondered.

I was so upset I called my mom and asked her what was wrong with Dad. She told me she had tried to send me flowers, but was unable to have them delivered in time for the holiday.

You'll get them tomorrow or the next day, she said.

And that's when I realized that Mom had had a role in those flowers being delivered on time every year. Now, it was definitely Dad's signature on the cards, but I believe Mom must have been in his ear reminding him what day to send flowers to which kid.

I was a little let down by the news, but it also gave me a new perspective on the situation. Does it really matter who sends the flowers if they make the recipient happy?

No, it really doesn't.

That was the last year I received flowers regularly, although Dad has since given me flowers on a couple of occasions. And my husband, Patrick? Well, the first time he sent me flowers was when we got engaged and they've been a rarity since then.

I, however, have become Flower Woman, the giver of good feelings via flora. I enjoy sending flowers for birthdays, special occasions, or just because I found an extra $5 in my pocket.

I want to share that little thrill I felt whenever I saw my flowers sitting in the office. Regardless of what the attached card reads, the presence of the flowers lets the recipient know that someone cares.

That's a pretty good feeling any day of the year.