BETWEEN THE LINES: EVOLUTION OF A NANNY: FROM MARY POPPINS TO LOUISE WOODWARD

I've learned that you can't make up a story that would be as well read or exciting as what happens in real life. Fiction is never as good as the truth.

And if you've read the newspapers or watched television lately, you've seen such an example in the au pair trial in Massachusetts.

Last week, Louise Woodward, a British au pair working for an upper-class Boston family, was convicted of murdering a baby that had been left in her care. She has been sentenced to life in prison, but the judge could reduce her sentence.

Now the court of public opinion has decided to try the case via the airwaves and newspapers in Massachusetts. Some blame the parents because they left the baby in her care. Others say the punishment is too harsh. It has even sparked a national debate about quality child care.

While reading the wire stories about the trial, some members of the Southeast Missourian staff debated whether the 19-year-old Briton would be convicted. By and large, we were wrong.

I personally haven't decided if Louise Woodward is guilty or innocent.

I find it hard to believe that a person who professes to care for a child would actually hurt that child. But we live in a society where parents abuse and starve their children. Nothing seems to surprise me anymore.

Likewise, child care providers can do terrible, evil things to the children left in their care. This is certainly not the first case where a baby has died while left in the care of a sitter.

But this is a case that really has given nannies and au pairs a bad reputation. What happened to Mary Poppins?

I was a nanny for several summers during college and have plenty of baby-sitting experience. I also know several girls from Germany, Ireland and England who were au pairs in the states. They didn't endanger the life of the child they cared for -- some of us had such fun with the children we even returned for another summer.

However, I have discovered that parents get the kind of child care they are willing to pay for. The au pair program began as a way for European girls to visit the United States and earn a little money during their stay. It's billed more as a travel excursion than a serious responsibility.

When I worked as a nanny, the Connecticut family I lived with was hesitant about me coming for the summer. I was only 17 at the time.

Needless to say, the parents didn't just leave all decisions up to me. We had some ground rules to work from, and I frequently discussed problems or ideas with them.

But they treated me as part of the family. I was involved in the lives of their children. I ran the household during the day while the parents were at work.

However, just because a parent chooses to work doesn't mean they quit being a parent. Someone has to raise the child -- and it should be the parents. As a nanny, I certainly didn't want all that responsibility to fall on my shoulders.

Parents can delegate their authority to child care providers, relatives, grandparents, etc., but ultimate control should rest in their hand.

As a society, we have relied on too many outside forces -- from classroom teachers to the television set -- to do a job that should be completed by parents.

It's difficult enough to grow up in our world today. We probably shouldn't add to the problems of children by confusing roles and demanding that strangers raise our children. They deserve better.

~Laura Johnston is a copy editor for the Southeast Missourian.