A DAY IN THE LIFE: EIGHT DAYS THIS WEEK

I spent last Sunday driving home from Kansas City, but the five-hour drive always wears me out. I got up on Monday not feeling like I had a nice relaxing weekend, which I did. I felt like someone had used me for a mattress all night.

It was a long day.

The next, April Fool's Day, came and went without one exploding receptacle or a single practical joke. I think people have become lazy or disinterested in this and April Fool's Day now displays a fundamental lack of effort.

Of course, this doesn't apply to the good people at Taco Bell. You heard about that, right? On April 1, Taco Bell purchased a full-page ad in eight national newspapers proclaiming that, in order to help defray the deficit, they had purchased the Liberty Bell in Philadelphia.

The one catch would be it would henceforth be called the Taco Liberty Bell.

The mayor of Philadelphia was in on it and April fool's were outraged. Some were still mad when they discovered it was joke, claiming it was a publicity stunt and should never have been played in the first place.

In my best Mr. T, I would tell them "I pity the April fool who can't take a joke."

Much of Tuesday was spent in class. Did you guys know I'm still in college at age 24? That explanation is a column that is long overdue and maybe I'll get around to writing it someday.

I came in to work Tuesday to work on our company newsletter. That's tense because I get to deal with all the big wigs around here. I keep imagining they're thinking about what a goofball I am, why was I hired in the first place and why am I still in college at 24 anyway?

Good questions all.

My father asked me on Tuesday night if he wrote a column would I publish it. I told him I would if it was decent and, to my chagrin, he began to write about what a great columnist Heidi Nieland is.

Thanks, Pop. If he keeps that theme going, you can be sure that's one column you will not be reading.

I got to spend a beautiful day in Jackson on Wednesday taking pictures of springtime activities. People playing ball in the park, walking around the lake, walking their dog; it was a lot of fun. I kept reminding myself I was actually getting paid for this.

Then that afternoon I met a bunch of nice young ladies who like to play soccer. Jackson has its first girls soccer team this year. Coach Bonnie Noland had been trying for five years to get one but the school board kept turning her down.

Never mind that there's been a boys soccer team for a million years.

And men wonder why women seem so "touchy" about equal rights.

Wednesday night I went over my speech once more that I would be giving the following day in class. (Yes, sometimes it is a drag to work 40 hours a week and still maintain a full college load.)

On Thursday I botched the whole speech up, stuttering and stammering my way around the mindlessness of the media. It turns out college-age students WANT all that murder, sex and O.J. in their news.

I guess they're not the only ones.

My fiancee Lori showed up last night and we went to see "12 Monkeys" at the dollar show. After last weekend in KC, I'm tapped.

Later, we went to a local pub and had a couple drinks. I ran into a buddy there who was livelier than usual and it was nice to see him smiling for once.

While the hours, minutes and days of this week are the same as any other, it just felt longer than most.

I would swear someone had slipped in an extra day somewhere.

~Scott Moyers is the editor of the Jackson USA Signal.