VP debate: 'Mansplaining' accusations against Pence insult Harris and all women

The vice presidential debate between Vice President Mike Pence and Sen. Kamala Harris on Wednesday has caused quite a bit of discussion of the typical who won/who lost kind. Not surprisingly, it also included another layer: people have made it a woman/man issue. I knew it would be touchy for Pence because that's a popular card folks love to play.

The card players pulled out the "mansplaining" accusation. Supposedly, Pence was condescending in his approach to his opponent and thus rude. Come on now. There was nothing condescending about Pence's approach to Harris. I'm not even sure he knows how to be condescending. She, on the other hand oozes condescension and snark. Thankfully, the debate between the two vice presidential candidates was more civil than the presidential debate, which should have made all of us itch all over. But let's be honest: If anyone was rude toward the other, it was Harris toward Pence. Her eye-rolling and tone alone were as loud as the vocal exchange between President Donald Trump and former Vice President Biden.

To the accusation that Pence mistreated Kamala "She's a Woman -- Be Nice to Her" Harris is absurd. It reminded me of the scene from "To Kill a Mockingbird" when Horace Gilmer, the lawyer representing Mayella Ewell, who accused Tom Robinson of raping her, objected to Atticus's line of questioning by saying he was "browbeating the witness," something anyone who knows Atticus knows he's simply not capable of:

"Judge Taylor laughed outright. 'Oh sit down, Horace, he's doing nothing of the sort. If anything, the witness's browbeating Atticus.'" Substitute some names, and we have the same situation. If anything, Harris was the aggressor.

Did Pence talk longer than his allotted time? Yes. Did Harris talk longer than her allotted time? Yes. Does this happen all the time during debates? Duh! Do candidates interrupt each other all the time? Duh again!

Pence didn't treat his time or his opponent any differently than any debater does -- well, unless you're Biden during the debate between Democrat presidential nominee hopefuls in which he appeared to run out of things to say and, hilariously, kept asking the moderator, "Is my time up?" ROFL! Look, everyone needs to do better, but it happens all the time. The only difference here was Harris's attempts to put Pence in his place by mothering him with "I'm speaking!" and "sistuhing" him by repeatedly rolling her eyes.

Now, folks want to act like he should have treated her with kid gloves because she's a woman. This is embarrassing. The card players think they're helping women; they're not. Mrs. Harris is a big girl. She can handle herself. She deserves to be trusted with the same kind of fiery debate every debater -- man or woman -- must endure. If Pence had held back just because she's a woman, would not that be insulting?

Harris herself set the scene for the mansplaining myth also, stating such things as, "I'm not going to have you lecture me on ..." Y'all know the word "lecture" was carefully chosen, as it lends itself to the card being played, right? News bulletin: It ain't a lecture; it's a debate. What did she think he was going to do there -- just grin and nod?"

Please stop degrading women by acting like we have to be handled softly. Respect should be given on both sides, yes, and rigorous debate is given on both sides. Whoever can't handle it, shouldn't get in the fray. It's demeaning to treat women differently. Pence's debate style, ladies and gentlemen, is what we call equality and politics, not mansplaining and sexism.

On the other hand, what about Biden's review of the debate? He told reporters in Arizona the next day, "I thought Kamala did a great job last night." He then added, "She was really presidential. She kept it on focus. I was really proud of her," he said.

He again seems to think she's running for president, rather than vice president. Recently, he referred to a "Harris-Biden administration," in that order. But I digress. He is "really proud of her." Is that condescending? Is it the equivalent of a pat on a woman's head? I mean, why does she need him to be "proud of her"? Did he offer that praise in that manner because, well, she's a woman? Who is he to be proud of her?" She's an accomplished, successful senator with quite the resume. Did she not only do what is expected of a person of her caliber? Hmmm? Biden supporters don't like it when the roles get reversed, do they?

So why don't we all just stop injecting sexism where there isn't any and reserve it for when it does exist? Bottom line, Pence paid Harris the ultimate respect by treating her as he would treat any candidate of any gender or race -- without rudeness, I again add. We may not like the interrupting that occurs on both sides of a podium. We may not like the tone that's used. But call it what it is: politics -- and nothing else. Labeling a man sexist for not tippy-toeing around a woman opponent but, instead, treating her as his equal is degrading to all women -- and the epitome of sexism itself.

Adrienne Ross is owner of Adrienne Ross Communications and a former Southeast Missourian editorial board member.