MISSOURIANA

Notice to Southeast Missouri weather watchers: In the event you have recently observed an off-white, wet substance falling from the sky, be advised it is called rain.

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Bill Clinton has a great future ahead of him in the field of creative finance. His first book should be about how someone with $5 million in debts can get a $1 million home loan.

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One of the advantages of no longer having to wait to enter your favorite Missouri casino is that you can now lose all your money and still have enough time to complete all your other errands.

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If you're a Missourian living near the New Madrid earthquake fault who doesn't believe it can happen here, then you share the once-held view of residents of Turkey, Greece, Taiwan and Mexico.

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