MISSOURI WATCH: ANY LATE WORD FROM JEFFERSON?

Boy, those Clintons are something else, aren't they? First Bill goes around imitating old tap dancers as he softshoes around every political hot potato in the Washington ballroom. Then Hillary starts talking to old presidents' wives, most notably departed Eleanor Roosevelt, in an attempt to gain some wisdom about how to handle White House duties and keep Republican wolves from the door.

You know, come to think about it, this talking to former first ladies and presidents isn't a bad idea. After all, there's no set of instructions when a couple moves into the executive mansion, and if you happen to be from Little Rock, Washington is a whole new ball game.

Hillary's idea might seem silly, but there are a lot of people in public life who could use some time tried and tested counsel from the experts. And who's more of an expert on how to run things than the fellows who once did it?

As a public service, I've combed the pithy statements of former presidents, all the way back to Washington, and herewith are some of the authentic pieces of advice from some of the 40 predecessors of Bill. Since the ex-presidents have commented on numerous affairs of state, I've matched their advice with today's crop of leaders who seem to be in need of a little sound counsel from time to time, like hourly.

For Bill the best counsel seems to come from Teddy Roosevelt, who noted in his autobiography that "No man can lead a public career really worth leading, no man can act with rugged independence in serious crises, nor strike at great abuses, nor afford to make powerful and unscrupulous foes, if he is himself vulnerable in his private character." Boy, the old Rough Rider is pretty rough, but who can deny his wisdom.

As for Bill's re-election effort, the best observation comes from the president who specialized in saying almost nothing at all, Calvin Coolidge. In his autobiography, Silent Cal had this pearl of wisdom: "An examination of the records of those presidents who have served eight years will disclose in most every instance the latter part of their term has shown very little in the way of constructive accomplishments." Yeah, Cal!

When Hillary finishes talking to Eleanor, she might benefit from Thomas Jefferson's observation in 1807: "I am tired of an office where I can do no more good than many others, who would be glad to be employed in it. To myself, personally, it brings nothing but unceasing drudgery and daily loss of friends. I will do my best to refrain from future agitation."

Bob Dole might benefit from John Adams' words in 1755: "Human nature is more easily wrought upon and governed by promises and encouragement and praise, than by punishment and threatening and blame. Commendation enlivens and stimulates to a noble ardor and emulation." Adding his two-cents was Jefferson, who in 1816 stated, "Above all things, and at all times, practice yourself in good humor."

How's this counsel from a vice president in 1789 who would soon become president, John Adams, for today's incumbent Al Gore: "My country has, in its wisdom, contrived for me the most insignificant office that ever the invention of man contrived or his imagination conceived." Or, as John Nance Garner once said, "The vice presidency isn't worth a bucket of spit." Except history has cleaned up old John Nance's earthy language, expunging a word that would make Tipper blush.

Lyndon Johnson, who knew Congress like the back of his hand, offered back in 1953 this sound advice to the leader of the minority party in the House of Representatives, Missourian Dick Gephardt: "There are two courses open to a minority party. It can indulge in the politics of partisanship, or it can remain true to the politics of responsibility. The first course is tempting to the weak, but ultimately would be rejected by the American people. The second course is difficult but is the road upon which we can offer leadership to the American people that will be accepted." That same year, LBJ added this advice: "The role of a minority party is to hammer out a program that will solve the problems of America---not just to obstruct the work of the majority party. All of us are American before we are members of any political organization."

George Washington, in his farewell address in 1796, might have been talking to House Speaker Newt Gingrich when he said, "The spirit of party serves to distract the public councils and enfeeble the public administration. It agitates the community with ill-founded jealousies and false alarms; kindles the animosity of one part against another; foments occasional riot and insurrection." Right on, George.

How's this timely observation by Teddy Roosevelt, delivered in 1906, for all the print and electronic egos who substitute partisan prejudices for factual discussions: "The men with the muckrakes are dispensable to the well-being of society. If only they could learn when to stop raking the muck, and look upward to the celestial crown above them, to the crown of worthy endeavor. There are beautiful things above and round about them; and if they gradually grow to feel that the whole world is nothing but muck, their power of usefulness is gone."

Was Dwight Eisenhower anticipating the anti-trade positions of Ross Perot and Pat Buchanan when he said in his second inaugural address in 1957: "One truth must rule all we think and do. No people can live to itself. The unity of all who dwell in freedom is their only sure defense. The economic need of all nations---in mutual dependence---makes isolation an impossibility; not even America's prosperity could long survive if other nations did not prosper. No nation can longer be a fortress, lone and strong and safe. Any people, seeking such shelter for themselves can now build only their own prison."

Maybe Jefferson was thinking of Missouri Governor Mel Carnahan back in 1821 when he observed "That 150 lawyers should do business together is not to be expected." Amen, Tom.

~Jack Stapleton of Kennett is the editor of the Missouri News and Editorial Service.